'My partner changed his will behind my back - I feel sick and betrayed'
It’s never nice to think about the inheritance you might receive upon the death of a loved one but having a will in place that confirms those details is very important to have. It becomes even more crucial if you’re in a relationship that isn’t legally recognised - if you aren’t married or in a civil partnership.
One woman has revealed she is now considering ending things with her long-term partner after discovering that he changed his last will and testament without her knowing. Wanting to know if she’s overreacting, she shared the situation on social media.
Admitting she felt embarrassed by the subject, she stated that she is fully aware she isn’t entitled to anything she didn’t work for. She wrote: “I live by this and I have since I was 16 been my ‘provider’ even though I come from a stable and well-off family with loving and supportive parents. But being independent has always been priceless to me.”
The 42-year-old explained that she and her 53-year-old partner had been together since 2009, and they’ve never had any issues. Adding that they both make good money and splitting things has always been very even.
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She went on: “In 2015 we bought our beautiful penthouse that we love very much. Around the same time, we started to think about the unpleasant things like death, etc and since we are each other’s family, we wrote wills that we inherited each other because we thought that the one leaving earlier could be in peace knowing the other will not have to worry about moving or lowering their standards.”
The woman believed that was it, however, during a deep cleaning of the apartment, she stumbled upon his new will, which was made in 2022. She revealed: “He only leaves me 10% and 10% to his mother, something we already agreed on, the rest goes to his sister and her family. I was shocked because we never talked about this and he never told me. He is still my sole ‘heir’ besides the 10% we were leaving to our mothers.”
Giving some background, the woman explained that his sister and her husband fell on hard times around that time, due to her getting fired from her high-paying job due to gross misconduct and her husband’s job being lost due to Covid.
She went on: “It turned out that they had accumulated lots of debt throughout the years but they are by no means poor. They just don’t have the means they had before. They still are way more well-off than any of my siblings.
Finishing, the woman admitted the whole thing had left her feeling sick and betrayed. She ended the Reddit post: “The thought makes me so hurt. Not only how unfair it is but how he hid it from me. I love him and I could just ignore this and change my will in secret too to make my much more deserving siblings my heirs and leave him crumbs but I don’t know. My heart is broken.”
People reading the story were understandably heartbroken for the woman. One person wrote: “I don’t think this is about money. This is about him going behind your back and changing things without your knowledge. So let’s get that out of the way.
“Partner betrayal is very painful because it makes you question the validity of the entire relationship itself. You start asking yourself what else did he hide. Can I believe in his words and actions moving forward? That feeling of you can dependent on your person begins to erode. Once that trust is broken, it’s very hard to repair. He should be transparent with you about why he didn’t talk to you about it first. Don’t make it about money 'cause it isn’t.”
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