'I'm having a birthday meal with family - but I'm banned from picking the place'
If someone tells you they're going to take you out for your birthday, you would probably expect them to let you choose the activity you take part in or the restaurant you eat at. After all, it's your birthday, and it should be spent doing things you enjoy and not having to cater to anyone else.
But one woman has been left furious after her family said they would take her out for dinner to mark her 29th birthday because even though she wanted to eat at a new Indian restaurant, she was told she couldn't - because her "picky" brother wouldn't like it.
The woman explained that her dad has always taken her and her 25-year-old brother out for dinner for their birthdays, and although he claims they can eat "wherever they want", she has always been told to choose somewhere that her brother will like too.
She wants to eat at a new Indian restaurant - but her brother won't like it (stock photo) (Getty Images/iStockphoto)This year, however, the woman has put her foot down and insisted she no longer wants to pander to her brother's tastes on her birthday - but her dad thinks she's being "selfish".
In a post on Reddit, she said: "So my dad has a tradition for birthdays for my brother and I where every year he picks us up a dessert of our choosing from our local bakery, takes us out to eat 'wherever we want', and then we go do an activity like bowling or movies or whatever else we pick. I know I'm very lucky to have a dad that does that even after we're adults and have moved out of the house.
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"The only thing is, my brother is an extremely picky eater, so since we were kids I've sort of always gotten stuck only choosing places to eat where he'll actually eat. My brother will pretty much only go out to eat at steakhouses or burger joints. So every year for my birthday since we were kids, that's where I've 'chosen' to go because he won't go anywhere else. Or I've 'chosen' to eat vanilla cupcakes because he won't eat the coffee cake I like.
"This year, when my dad asked me where I'd like to eat, I told him there was this new Indian place I'd heard about that I really wanted to try. He asked if I could pick somewhere else because my brother won't eat Indian food.
"I told him I was kind of tired of eating cheeseburgers for my birthday just because my brother is picky, and asked if my dad and I could have dinner together, and then pick my brother up to go out afterwards. He accused me of being selfish, so I sort of just dropped the point and stopped texting him about it."
The woman insisted she knows the problems she's facing aren't "that deep", but said it still upsets her that every birthday is centred around her brother and his eating habits.
She added: "I know it's not that deep to go eat burgers or whatever, but I do kind of feel like it's not fair that I've had to centre birthday activities around my brother's preferences my whole life. I don't know though, I might be being super immature.
"Would I be the a**hole if I insisted on doing what I actually want, or should I just suck it up and drop it and go eat what my brother likes?"
People in the comments agreed with the woman, stating that her brother should be able to find something mild on the menu that he will eat, or just not go out for dinner.
One person wrote: "Your brother can find some mild food on the menu or not go. It's your birthday, you shouldn't have to choose food that he likes. He wouldn't make his birthday meal about you, why should yours be catered to him?"
While another added: "I don't get why a dad who wants to let his kids feel special would only make one feel welcome. Your brother has the right, I guess, to a limited palate. I hope he enjoys the delicious glass of water he's willing to have at your Indian restaurant dinner."
And a third said: "If they want to celebrate YOUR birthday then you should pick. Your brother is a grown man he can either suck it up or sit this one out."
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