'I split up with ex just before pandemic - now I'm housebound with long Covid'

25 December 2023 , 15:26

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One lonely reader crippled by long Covid fears they have no one to call in an emergency [file pic] (Image: Getty Images)

I hope you can provide some advice and reassurance, as I’m feeling overwhelmed right now and I’m really struggling to face the day.

Unfortunately, I have very little support in my life and I have Long Covid, which means I’m effectively ­housebound. It has been life-changing. What’s made things so much worse is that I split up with my ex just before I got Covid, so had to struggle through the illness on my own, as well as cope with heartbreak. It was a really challenging time.

Previous to being ill, I was very physically active and a member of several walking clubs, and this was my main hobby. I really miss it, but ­probably miss the social contact it provided even more. The other day I had a scary thought: in an emergency I have literally no one to call.

I have no idea how to get myself out of this horrible rut I’m in. On a positive note, my doctors say I’m being positive in tackling the Long Covid, as I’m proactive and hopefully I will get better in time. However, this loneliness is very hard to deal with. Can you help?

Coleen says

I think feeling ­overwhelmed is something many people can relate to. When you feel mentally and physically so down, you tend to focus on all the negatives and it’s hard to see even a glimmer of positivity. You have to take baby steps to turn it around. Start with your mindset and consciously looking for positives every day because they’re there.

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For example, you beat Covid and you are slowly getting better. As for your ex, heartbreak takes time to heal, but try to reframe what happened – he wasn’t good enough for you and you deserve a better ­relationship.

Please don’t be scared to start reaching out to people – friends in the walking groups, old mates and colleagues. I spend a lot of time talking about the negative aspects of social media, but it is great for connecting you to new people and old friends, as well as support groups.

There are also online courses and wellbeing apps, it’s just a question of making a start. Google friendship groups and see what comes up locally. Often there are phone friendship groups, too. Also, your doctor might have some ideas about local support.

Could you give yourself some goals such as a short walk around the block or a walk to the corner shop? You want to fix your situation and that’s positive, but remember that you don’t have to fix it all tomorrow. Start with one little part of it and the next day you’ll have more confidence to try something else.

Coleen Nolan