My boyfriend's five-word proposal has me doubting whether I want to marry him
For many, the way they are proposed to will set the tone for the marriage - regardless of whether you'd like to be proposed to in a flashy way, or would prefer something cute and low-key.
One woman found her proposal seriously dismissive, however, when her boyfriend turned to her and said five words that had her doubting whether she should even be with him anymore.
During a camping trip, she was left "crying" as she thought he wasn't going to propose to her after their eight-year relationship, and she really wanted him to - but when he did it, disappointment was all she felt.
She took to Reddit to ask people what to do after her gutting proposal. She wrote: "My fiancé and I have been together for eight years. As a whole, we have a great stable relationship but I can't move past my constant disappointment with his proposal.
"I didn't receive a this is why I love you speech or a grand gesture of asking me to marry him, he never even got down on one knee (not that it's the end of the world but it's just painting the picture).
'I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time'
"It was the last day of our camping trip, that I really thought he was going to propose during. That evening he only wanted to go fishing so I sat in my kayak probably 7ft away and cried to myself for over an hour that it wasn't going to happen since he didn't propose at any beautiful hiking viewpoints or sunsets through the week and we were leaving in the morning."
But when they "brought the kayaks in after fishing until after dark" and he went to his truck, came back, and handed her a ring box, it was his five lacklustre words that made her feel devastated. As he handed her the ring box, he said: "This should make you happy."
She continued: "I booked the same campsite on the same lake on the same day this year and hinted over and over again that he could make it up to me. He did not even acknowledge the anniversary of our engagement. We are to get married in August but I can't move forward from this. I cry when friends get beautiful engagements, I cry watching romcoms.
"I feel nothing but disappointment that I will never experience the gesture of love I dreamed about my whole life. Any time we have a disagreement or I feel unwanted by him I am just reminded of the disappointment I feel in regard to the proposal. I don't even enjoy looking at my beautiful ring because it doesn't bring me a happy memory.
"This feeling is clouding how I feel about him, even though he has never treated me poorly and is my best friend. I don't want to ruin my relationship over this but I don't know how to move on. He said he can't change how things happened, which is true but it's been over a year and I can't seem to move past my disappointment."
In the comments, some were concerned about the potential longevity of their relationship, with one writing: "My parents' engagement was similar except he threw it to her and said, 'have this'. They're divorced now." Another fumed: "'This should make you happy' is not a proposal at all. You would be well within your rights to give it back until he actually asks you to marry him. Honestly, he doesn't really sound like he likes you that much. Sad to say your resentment to him will most likely continue to grow. Don't get married until this is resolved."
Someone else agreed, saying: "Give the ring back and tell him if he actually proposes to you with the words 'Will you marry me?' And a list of reasons why he is asking that you will say Yes! If he hasn't come up with a real proposal within six months then you will know it's over and you really mean nothing to him. So you will pack your bags and leave."
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