'I excluded one child from daughter's party because he has special needs'
A nurse has been slammed for excluding one child from her daughter's birthday party because he has 'special needs'. She explained how she is planning a pool party to celebrate her second-grade daughter's birthday - and has invited all but one child from her class.
Originally, she told her daughter she could either invite everyone or just the girls because she didn't want to leave anybody out - but she changed her mind after hearing what her daughter had to say about this. She said on Reddit: "One student in her class, let’s call him Tyler, is nonverbal autistic. I’ve met him a few times, and he’s a sweet kid, but nonverbal autistic. He is in my daughter's class partially but leaves midway through the day to go to a special program or something.
"My daughter, as respectfully as a second grader could be, asked me if it was okay if Tyler did not receive an invite. She said he’s barely in her class and doesn’t really know anyone, and it might be tough for him to be at a pool party." After speaking to her husband, the woman decided to exclude Tyler and give out the invites through the post so he doesn't find out about the party.
She added: "I was talking about this at my work with a couple of other nurses and a few of them thought I was being horrible by telling her she didn’t need to include the child with special needs. I said that I do not have any experience handling special needs children, and I didn’t know if he would need special assistance or even need his mom or a caretaker there the whole time.
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"A coworker told me I made a huge mistake by 'teaching my daughter that it’s okay to exclude those who are different'. I don't know if I’d read that much into it." Commenting on her post, one user said: "You gave her the option of just the girls or the entire class, she chose the entire class but you're allowing her to exclude one single person for something they cannot help. Not a bully, but a second-grader with a disability. I'm really disgusted you think this is OK."
Another user added: "You are definitely teaching your daughter that it's okay to exclude people who are different. It's not your choice if he can handle the party or not. He should absolutely receive an invite and his parents/caregivers can decide if he's capable of attending. I missed the fact that you're a nurse because I was so mad already. You really should know better.
"I hope your coworkers report your lack of compassion to the higher-ups because I can only imagine what your bedside manner is like. A third user said: "How hard would it have been to speak to Tyler's parents and understand what his needs were and ask for their opinion. Basically you have taught your daughter it's OK to exclude people who are different without actually making the effort to understand whether Tyler could attend or not."
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