'I loved my fiancé's sweet proposal - but I hate the ring he chose'
A woman says she's been left in a difficult position after her fiancé revealed the engagement ring he'd picked out for her, and wonders whether she should just be honest and risk hurting his feelings.
The bride-to-be couldn't have been happier when her now-future husband popped the all-important question during a romantic holiday away and says she adored his "great and very sweet" proposal.
She's decidedly less thrilled about the ring he chose for her, however. Although the style of the band is very much to her personal taste, she just isn't sure about the diamond, which is said to be "so tiny it's just lost" on her hand.
The soon-to-be bride is now torn between being brutally honest with her other half and potentially offending him, or continuing to wear an engagement ring she simply doesn't care for.
Taking to Mumsnet, the conflicted woman wrote: "I didn't want to be ungrateful as he really has tried here and the style of it is my dream ring, and he picked something from Tiffany all by himself.
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"That may have a part to play as I know they mark up prices for everything. Anyway, the diamond is a 0.22-carat and while it is very very sparkly it is so so small it's barely noticeable."
Reaching out to fellow Mumsnet users for advice, she continued: "Do I just keep quiet about this even though I don't totally love it, or do I be honest?
"I'd be willing to pay for the difference to say change to a 0.5-carat diamond instead but don't want to offend him by suggesting this.
"I'm not after some big 2-carat ring or something. I assume the platinum band itself was pricey. I've no idea how much it cost and I know I don't need to know that, I don't know if upgrading the diamond by half a carat is going to be unreasonable either."
Her diamond dilemma left a number of people divided. While many pointed out that her partner would be very likely offended by this suggestion, others remarked that it was a piece of jewellery she would wear forever, and so it was worth getting right.
One person advised: "Sorry this might be the answer, but if my fiancé chose an engagement ring unless it was hideous, I would accept the ring graciously.
"To be honest, if I gave someone a Tiffany ring and they would prefer to upgrade the carat, I would take this as a red flag and reconsider our compatibility. I would carefully consider if the marriage will flourish and your lifestyle expectations going forward will be met."
Another agreed: "I also have an engagement ring I wouldn't have chosen, but I love it because my husband cared enough to choose it for me.
"If you hated the style I think you might be able to say something without hurting him, but I can't imagine a way of wording 'the diamond you bought me is too small' that comes across well."
Taking a different view, a third person suggested: "Another option would be to add a halo of small diamonds around the original stone - this can make it look a lot bigger and more impactful.
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"I'm so tired of this sentiment that because the big important man has bought his lucky lucky little woman a ring, she should automatically love it and wear it forever. It's 2023, for f**** sake."
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