Oprah Winfrey reflects on success and is proud she ‘never hurt anyone’
Despite growing up on a humble farm in Mississippi, Oprah Winfrey said she “always knew she was destined for greatness”.
Describing her hugely successful career as a talk-show host, actress, philanthropist and author as something of a “calling”, the star had a feeling that her life would end up being miles away from where she grew up, both literally and metaphorically. This self-belief from such a young age is all the more remarkable when you consider that Oprah, who is set to celebrate her 70th birthday on 29 January, had something of a traumatic childhood and start in life.
Having spent the first six years of her life living apart from her teenage mother Vernita (who had already split from dad Vernon), she was brought up by her grandmother on a pig farm. She said: “I remember a specific moment, watching my grandmother hang the clothes on the line, and her saying to me, ‘You are going to have to learn to do this,’ and me being in that space of awareness and knowing that my life would not be the same as my grandmother’s life."
She is now one of the most faces faces in showbiz (Getty Images FOR ESSENCE)She certainly wasn’t wrong, and Oprah overcame horrific events – such as being sexually abused by her teenage cousin at just nine years old, after she had moved to Wisconsin to live with her mother – going on to become one of the most powerful and influential women in the world, as well as a billionaire to boot.
Calling herself a “teacher”, it’s Oprah’s ability to connect with others that led to her enormous success as a TV host, and the down-to-earth star always had just as much time for members of the audience as she did for her celebrity guests. The Oprah Winfrey Show, which launched in 1986, fast became the highest-rated daytime series in the US, and by the time it ended its run in 2011, viewers felt like Oprah was part of their family.
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Oprah’s ability to connect with others led to her enormous success as a TV host (AP)
Oprah was born in 1954 (Alamy Stock Photo)Her relatability has always been the key to Oprah’s success, as well as her willingness to share her own vulnerabilities to ask the important questions in life. Some of her most iconic interviews have been with figures such as the late Michael Jackson, Barack Obama and Tom Cruise, who famously jumped up and down on her couch as he talked about his relationship with then-girlfriend Katie Holmes.
Most recently, Oprah’s March 2021 interview with the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, who she lives close to in Montecito, California, made headlines across the world, due to their shocking claims that certain members of the royal family had made racist comments.
Oprah made headlines with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle in 2021 (Harpo Productions/Joe Pugliese v)Before Oprah became known for her razor-sharp interviewing skills, she appeared in The Color Purple in 1985 and was nominated for an Oscar for her portrayal of the inspirational and rebellious Sofia. Although a talented actress, Oprah decided this wasn’t the route she wanted to go down, but she says that working on the recent adaptation of the movie, four decades after the original, has been a real “full circle” moment for her.
Talking about the musical version of the film, which was released last year and which she co-produced, Oprah said: “One of the greatest highlights of my life was that experience back in ’85 and now to be blessed enough to have lived, to have come full circle, to see it again and to be able to literally pass it on to another generation is just the greatest reward.”
Gratitude, and counting her blessings is something that Oprah is a big fan of, and in a recent interview she said she starts and ends every day by saying “thank you” for what she has. One of the things she’s definitely grateful for is Stedman Graham, who’s been her partner for more than 30 years. The couple met in 1986 at a charity event but Stedman had a girlfriend at the time. Oprah seized her moment as soon as he was single and asked him out when they were visiting a mutual friend who was unwell. She said: “I thought he was nice enough, but I wasn’t that impressed.
He was polite, yes, and kind. The sort of guy who sits with an ailing friend. Tall and handsome, for sure. But actually too handsome, I thought, to be interested in me.” This idea that she wasn’t good enough for her man stayed with Oprah for years, and her yo-yo weight battles were well documented on her show.
In 1988, she showcased her 4st 11lb weight loss to whoops and cheers from the studio audience, but she’s always maintained she was doing it for herself and not for her man. She said: “I love Stedman very much. And he cares about me and has been very supportive of me, fat and thin. I did not do this for Stedman.”
Oprah is one of TV's most famous faces (Variety via Getty Images)She reflected on this again in 2011, and admitted that part of her motivation to lose weight had been to make herself feel like more of a match for Stedman. She said: “He’s a very good-looking guy. And I knew that when people would see us together that the first thing they were thinking – I certainly thought for myself – what they were thinking was, ‘What’s he doing with that fat girl?’”
Fortunately, Oprah’s insecurities have faded over the years and while they have never married, despite getting engaged in 1992, the couple remain committed. On the subject of why they never wed, Oprah is open about the fact that her career has always been a huge priority for her. In fact, she went as far as to suggest that if she and Stedman had got married, they would have separated by now.
She said: “Nobody believes it, but it’s true. The only time I brought it up was when I said to Stedman, ‘What would have happened if we had actually got married?’ And the answer is, ‘We wouldn’t be together.’ We would not have stayed together, because marriage requires a different way of being in this world. His interpretation of what it means to be a husband and what it would mean for me to be a wife would have been pretty traditional, and I would not have been able to fit into that.”
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She may not be up for being his wife, but nobody could be more proud of their partner than Stedman, 72, is of Oprah, and he says the secret to their success is that he wants nothing but good things for her.
He said: “The thing about our relationship is I want the best for her. So I’m dedicated to her happiness, so that’s great for her and I want her to be the best she can be, and she’s done a pretty good job of doing it.” Determined to make a difference, Oprah founded the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls, a boarding school in South Africa, in 2007. And while she never had children with Stedman – she lost a premature baby son, Canaan, when she was 14 years old – her maternal instincts are very strong.
Talking about the school, Oprah said: “It is more rewarding than I would ever have imagined. I was doing this to help them, but it has brought a light to my life that I can’t explain.” She added: “When people were pressuring me to get married and have children, I knew I was not going to be a person that ever regretted not having them, because I feel like I am a mother to the world’s children.”
Another hugely important relationship is the one she shares with her long-term best friend and fellow broadcaster Gayle King, 69. On her love for her pal, Oprah said: “She is the mother I never had. She is the sister everybody would want. She is the friend that everybody deserves. I don’t know a better person.”
As the old saying goes, it takes one to know one, and as she reflects on her 70 years, Oprah – who has won countless awards for her TV work and her humanitarian efforts – says, “The reason why 70 feels so solid and so good is because I didn’t have to harm anybody in the process. Not only did I not harm, I brought a lot of joy to people.”
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