'My date made me foot the bill on our second meet - It's really put me off'

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The incident has put her off her new suitor (Stock Photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
The incident has put her off her new suitor (Stock Photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Dating etiquette can be awkward at times, especially when it comes to sorting out the bill. Unfortunately, one single woman has been left in a very tricky situation after a man she recently met expected her to pay the full £110 for their second dinner date.

According to this baffled singleton, everything seemed to be going well on her first date with a man she'd met online. He seemed to be "a really nice guy", and she was impressed that he appeared to have "great interests and a gorgeous dog".

For their first date, they headed out for a sandwich lunch, which only set them back around £8, but decided to go for something a bit more special for their second date, booking in for dinner at a pricey pub. At this point, things started to get a bit uncomfortable, over what she assumed must have been a misunderstanding over the bill.

Taking to Mumsnet, the unnamed woman wrote: "Again it went well I thought, but conscious on seeing the prices on the menu I knew I wouldn't want him to pay for me particularly as he had bought me the sandwich.

"At the end of the meal when he asked for the bill, I said you paid last time so I don't want you paying again. He misconstrued this as me saying I would settle the whole thing (what I meant was we just had split it) and I guess I was so flummoxed that this had happened I just paid especially since the waitress was kind of hovering over us. I was embarrassed to talk about it. Bill was £110!"

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Reaching out for advice on this tricky dilemma, she continued: "I guess I just wonder if this is a major red flag. I don't know him well enough to determine and honestly it's put me off. I don't think I want to meet up again. Yes, I can afford it as I've worked really hard to build up my own business. I didn't tell about money at all and am not flashy but I did talk about what I do and maybe he just made an assumption?"

Those in the comments section were left divided on the matter. While many felt it was just an issue of miscommunication, others felt it was a bit "cheeky" on the man's part, given that the date he'd paid for was so much cheaper.

One fellow Mumsnet user commented: "From your description, it sounds like you offered to pay. I wouldn't think he did anything wrong to accept." Another agreed: "So you booked it and you told him you didn't want him paying again. I think the issue here is a lack of clarity on your behalf."

Taking a different view, a third person remarked: "If you'd been together months I wouldn't care but on date two?! You are not being unreasonable. He's shouldn't have accepted when there was a massive difference like that. He should've split or paid for all the drinks if you headed somewhere after the meal. Paying £8 versus £110 when you've met someone twice is really cheeky! Even if he misunderstood your offer, he should have known that wasn't a fair exchange."

Have you got an awkward dating story to share? Email us at [email protected]

Julia Banim

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