Man's proposal as girlfriend graduated sparks backlash for 'stealing limelight'
Ideally, the moment your other half proposes to you will prove to be a very special memory indeed, and one which you'll look back on fondly for years to come.
That's why proposers tend to think so carefully about how they're going to pop the question, ensuring that they a location that feels right for their other half, and for their relationship as a whole. Unfortunately, one young man's recent proposal has sparked a fair bit of dismay after footage of it was shared online, and many feel he chose his timing poorly.
The clip in question, which was originally shared via Newcastle University's social media accounts, shows a young woman in graduation robes, preparing to collect her diploma. Just as her name was called, however, her boyfriend, who was also clad in robes, hopped on stage too, clearly taking her by surprise as he got down on bended knee.
The audience at Newcastle's King's Hall erupted with applause after they realised what was going on, and judging by the man's delighted smile and jubilant waves to onlookers, it's clear he got the answer he was looking for.
Sharing the moment on social media, Newcastle University wrote: "There's more than one way to make your day in King's Hall memorable #WeAreNCL #NCLGrad."
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Many agreed the proposal was memorable, however not everybody was convinced that it was all that appropriate, and felt his actions had in fact overshadowed what should have been a defining moment in the woman's life - her graduation day.
Newcastle University has since taken the footage down from its social media accounts, but the gesture is still sparking heated conversations online. One unimpressed individual tweeted: "I'll start with the caveat that I hope they're happy and congratulations! BUT (call me unromantic), I would be absolutely raging if a man did this lol. This day is about your achievements - don't make it about your relationship. Do it tomorrow, or the day after! Just no!!"
Another agreed: "I'm sure he thought he was doing a good thing, but he made her graduation all about him! Agree she should run like the clappers and never stop until he's less than a speck of dust in the distance."
A third person remarked: "Having been proposed to three times, if I was proposed to in public, let alone on a special occasion for me, I'd break off the entire relationship. Why make it harder for me to decline."
Although a number of people felt it would have been acceptable to propose on graduation day, they felt this should have happened later on, after the ceremony in a more private setting. While some went on to defend the pair, claiming that in some cultures it's "common" for couples to get engaged on a graduation day, although it's not clear if this is the case here.
Following on from the backlash, we asked an expert if public proposals are as "awful" as everyone seems to think they are. Sharin Shafer, relationship expert and co-founder of Bond The Agency, told the Mirror: "Whatever your opinion on public proposals are, there is one absolute piece of advice I would give, and it is this: a proposal is a matter of personal preference and should consider both yours and your partner's personality and expectations.
"Remember, a public proposal is a way to show your love to the world and celebrate with others, but it may also cause stress or embarrassment. (Think about Mike's and Phoebe's various public proposals in Friends and the fallouts from them!)
"I would argue that if you are considering a public proposal before you embark on this gesture, ask yourself the following questions: Is your partner shy? Does speaking in public make you nervous? Are either of you uncomfortable with dramatic public displays of affection and emotion? Is there a chance he/she will say 'no' or ask for time to think about it?
"If the answer is 'Yes', to any of these questions, then I would recommend you avoid a public proposal."
Although a public proposal might work beautifully for some extroverts, Shafer went on to caution that this should never be done in such a way that you end up taking attention away from somebody else's special day.
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They continued: "I would say however that if you do wish to do the proposal publicly – be aware of when you do it. Never do it during an event where you would risk stealing someone else’s spotlight - for instance at a wedding as the gaze of that day should be firmly on the bride and groom and not be shifted elsewhere.
"Remember if an event is of special significance to someone (and for some, the recent graduation will have been their time in the spotlight) then the event should be remembered for that rather than have the event hijacked by someone's proposal as this may appear selfish, even if the intention was well-meaning."
The Mirror has reached out to Newcastle University for comment.
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