'My tech-savvy elderly mum was scammed out of £2,000 - because she loves me'
They say you can’t put a price on love, but it just cost my mum two thousand pounds.
She got a text from me, saying I’d dropped my phone down the loo, which was why I was messaging from an unfamiliar number, and that I had a bill which needed paying urgently or the interest would double overnight.
We exchanged messages back and forth. It all happened very quickly. Eager to help her only child, my mum transferred all the money I asked for from her savings.
The problem? It wasn’t me who was messaging her.
The text had begun, “Hi Mum”, because she’d been duped by the Bank Of Mum And Dad scam people all over the world are losing money to, thanks to the way it pulls so cleverly on the parental heartstrings.
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As she put it when she rang to tell oblivious me what had happened: “I’ve been scammed, and it’s all your fault!”
If you haven’t heard of the Bank Of Mum And Dad ruse before, pay close attention so you can warn others.
My mum isn’t some doddery Luddite. She’s incredibly tech savvy – she tweets, she’s the queen of LinkedIn, and she’s keeping Amazon afloat almost single-handedly.
If she can be tricked by this, anyone can. Common sense goes out the window when emotions are involved.
The worst thing about the scam – apart from the financial hit, obviously – is that it’s made her feel stupid.
She’s kicking herself and can’t believe she fell for it. It doesn’t matter how many times I forward her news stories about the £1.5million taken through this scam between February and June last year, or reporting that it’s so widespread it’s sparked a regulatory crackdown, with a customer protection scheme due to be launched by the end of 2023. None of that seems to matter.
She feels silly, and that’s what makes me the most angry about her being conned.
So that some good can come of this, please let’s spread the word, and ruin the scammers’ chances in the future. If you get a message from a number you don’t recognise, be wary. Even if they say they’re someone you know.
Stop. Think for a minute. Don’t be rushed into action.
If my mum had simply rung me, or even my husband, to double check the phone-down-loo story, the scammers would have been scuppered.
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Some families set up a code word they can say to each other in emergencies. If you haven’t, you could ask a question like what did we have for dinner the last time we ate together, or something else only they’d know.
If it’s really them, they won’t mind you taking extra steps to make sure you’re safe.
It’s also worth checking whether the tone and manner even sound like your family member. My mum’s scammer didn’t use any apostrophes. I’m actually quite offended she ever believed I’d use such sloppy punctuation, but now is not the time.
My mum’s bank – which a quick Google confirms has refunded customers for this exact scam in the past – decided not to in her case.
She’s too distressed by the whole experience to appeal, even though I think she should. She just wants it behind her.
She feels like the scammers have won. Please, remember this, and don’t be their next success story.
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