'Son wants to propose right after his A-level results but it's too soon'

04 July 2023 , 16:55
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The mum voiced her concerns about her son
The mum voiced her concerns about her son's romantic plan (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/Tetra images RF)

Is there anything sweeter than young love? Arguably, yes, if you're the parent of a youngster you think is rushing into a commitment they're not ready for.

But how far should parents go when it comes to their young adults? And at what point should we be free to fly or fall based on our own choices?

It's a question sparking serious debate online after a mum revealed her terror at learning her son, 18, plans to propose to his girlfriend, and said she was upfront with him about her feelings.

Sharing her concern in a post to Mumsnet, the doting parent explained: "My eldest dear son is 18 (January Birthday) he has just finished his A-Levels, sensible kid usually.

'Son wants to propose right after his A-level results but it's too soon' qhiqqkiqrqixuinvHe wants to propose before the pair start university (stock photo) (Getty Images)

"He's been with a girl for nearly two years, she is the daughter of our close family friends, they grew up together effectively, my dear husband went to school with her dad, she turned 18 in April, also just finished her A-Levels.

Mum's touching gesture to young son who died leaves Morrisons shopper in tearsMum's touching gesture to young son who died leaves Morrisons shopper in tears

"They are very very close, we live an hour from her, they have never gone to the same school etc. but at every opportunity he drives to either pick her up and bring her to ours or he is staying at hers."

She added that the youngsters weren't allowed to see each other Monday-Thursday during school, but that now their exams have finished they see "they are together more than ever" and their friendship groups have merged.

And when September rolls around, they plan to move in together, as they're both attending different universities in the same city. Nonetheless, the teen's mum was stunned to learn he plans to propose to his girlfriend.

"He told me that when they go on holiday together next month he is going to propose," she wrote. "I'm shocked to put it lightly he is only 18!! He told me doesn't think they will get married while at uni but would like to show her that he wants to and fully intends to spend the rest of his life with her."

Her post concluded: "I didn't know what to say, so I said I thought it was a bad idea but I would stand by him no matter what.

"Am I being unreasonable to think he has actually lost his mind?"

In response, commenters were quick to weigh in with their opinions - and many wished the couple well.

One person advised: "Of course you have to be supportive but university is a big life change which may consider them to re-consider. And definitely encourage them to live together before marrying, and have proper discussions about their life plans etc."

A second replied: "Although he's young, he seems quite sensible. Getting engaged at that age isn't a bad thing - I'd worry more if they were booking the wedding straight away. Uni may change their feelings anyway."

Someone else added: "It does work for some. And how many people still regret not ending up with their first love?

'I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time''I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time'

"They might be the lucky ones!"

Amber O'Connor

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