Polio Paul's 30-year romance with blind woman after fiancée heartbreak
may have been sentenced to a life in an iron lung after contracting at the age of six – but that didn’t stop him from meeting the woman of his dreams.
For more than 70 years, Paul lay horizontal in his ventilator which he dubbed both his “cocoon” and “coffin” – until his death on Monday (March 11). But like a butterfly, the Dallas, native had a metamorphosis.
“I decided I was going to fight this. I was going to have a life,” he told Health Day. Despite being confined to his iron lung, Polio Paul fell head over heels – not once, but twice. A blind woman named Kathy became his saving grace after a break-up tipped him to the edge of despair.
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Rewind to Paul’s college days and the 21-year-old locked eyes with a young lady called Claire. It was love at first sight for the Southern Methodist University student who quickly proposed – albeit not getting down on one knee. To Paul’s delight, she said yes.
Strictly's Molly Rainford and Tyler West fuel romance rumours while on tourWhile the happy fiancée paraded her wedding band, her mother didn’t share in her delight and took a dislike to her prospective son-in-law due to his condition. One day, Paul rang Claire's house expecting his wife-to-be to pick up.
Instead, it was Claire’s mother who told him that he could never marry her daughter. In fact, he was told he should never speak to her again either.
"Took years to recover from that," he said to The Guardian, as he transferred college to the University of Texas at Austin, alone. Paul never did find his wife, but he did find the closest thing to it: Kathy Gaines.
As a type-1 diabetic, Kathy had her own difficulties navigating the world. She was legally blind as a consequence of the disease and couldn’t drive.
But after meeting Paul, she became his “arms and legs” and he became her eyes. For the last three decades before Paul’s death, Kathy stayed by Paul’s side. “Kathy and I grew together… she stretched herself over as many things as I needed,” Paul told The Guardian.
Despite lacking sight, Kathy knew Paul intimately. She would shave his face, change his sheets, clip his toes and pop to the shops when he’s out of groceries.
Although Paul and Kathy were never officially romantically involved, Paul’s brother, Phil, said they were like husband and wife. “Paul has always been aggressive about things that he wants and needs around other people,” he said.
“He’s pretty demanding. But Kathy is more demanding than he is. They’ve had their moments, but they always work it out.”
Paul’s life was about working things out. He went on to fulfil his dreams becoming a lawyer and author. In 2020 he wrote a memoir ‘Three Minutes for a Dog’ – alluding to the time he breathed unassisted for 180 seconds out of his iron lung and was gifted a puppy called Ginger.
In one passage, he wrote: “No matter where you're from or what your past is, or the challenges you could be facing. You can truly do anything. You just have to set your mind to it, and work hard.”
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