'My school-age son isn't toilet trained - I'm sick of people judging'

02 March 2024 , 17:42

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She claimed it's nothing to do with being lazy - it couldn't be helped (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/EyeEm)

A mum has slammed people for branding her lazy for not toilet-training her son.

Every parent will have their own ways of raising children, and every family is different. However, one thing most parents will try to nail is ensuring their child is toilet trained ahead of starting school, while this is not always possible in some cases, it's still frowned upon in schools.

Now one mum has clapped back at cruel comments shaming her for not getting her son toilet trained for school as she claimed it's not laziness - and is sick of people judging her as it was something that couldn't have been helped.

After she saw there had been a rise in the number of children starting school and not being toilet trained - around 13 per cent - she admitted it was shocking, but could "sympathise" as her son struggled. It was reported that teachers were spending on average 2.5 hours a day dealing with toilet issues and accidents, she shared her situation as she claimed she was "embarrassed" on behalf of her son.

In an anonymous post on Mumsnet, the mum candidly opened up about her son and wrote: "My son started reception with issues surrounding pooing - mostly holding onto it, becoming constipated and having leaks. I remember always packing spare pants for him and I know the TA had to help him change a lot."

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Defending her parenting, she clarified: "This wasn't anything to do with laziness on my part. He was just hard to toilet-train and continued with these issues for quite some years. The school was always lovey about it but I felt very embarrassed and upset on behalf of my son.

"I feel the general narrative behind this story is that parents just can't be arsed to toilet train their kids and are happily sending them in and letting teachers deal with them. But that's not always the case. I know it's a big drain on schools but what's the answer? And why has there been such a rise?" She concluded in her post.

However, not all parents were sympathetic, as one Mumsnet user brutally wrote: "Disabilities aside, it's pure and utter lazy parenting. Waiting until they are ready is a ridiculous view created by snowflake parents, children need to be taught to understand the feeling of needing the toilet."

But another reassured the mum and added: "Kids like yours will have always existed but a large proportion of the 13% will be kids who would have been trained by 2 or 3 thirty years ago. Your son might get lumped in with them in some people's eyes but generally, people understand that there have always been a minority of kids with specific issues."

Niamh Kirk