TOWIE's Georgia Kousoulou tells of '12 weeks of hell' before losing baby
“When you lose a baby, it’s so lonely,” says reality TV star Georgia Kousoulou. “I think my body has gone into defence mechanism to protect me.”
She lost her second child 12 weeks into her pregnancy last April after discovering it had triploidy, a rare condition where a baby’s cells have 69 chromosomes instead of the usual 46. It can happen when two sperm fertilise one egg and the life-threatening condition means babies could be stillborn, have severe congenital problems or would only survive a few hours.
When doctors told her about the condition at 12 weeks, Towie star Georgia, 32, was advised, on medical grounds, to have a termination. She says: “Triploidy is so rare. There is no survival rate, and the chances are I would have had a stillbirth. The doctors said ‘We need to remove the baby’. So I had to terminate the pregnancy which goes against everything I believe in, but I had no choice.”
Georgia at her wedding in December (https://www.instagram.com/georgiakousoulou/?hl=en)
Georgia and her husband with their two-year-old son Brody (https://www.instagram.com/georgiakousoulou/?hl=en)Georgia, who has two-year-old son Brody with husband Tommy Mallett, 31, instantly knew she was pregnant the second time. “I got a bump very quickly. I think your body knows. At the second scan, they thought the [amniotic] sac was too small and then I had a bleed. By the time I got to 12 weeks, I had had more scans in that pregnancy than I had ever had with Brody. I had expected to go in there with no heartbeat, but there was one. So I had really connected with this baby. It was 12 weeks of hell. My emotions were just so up and down.
“All the doctors said to me the chances are it is never going to happen to you again because it’s a rare case. It could be that two sperm hit the same egg.” Georgia writes very movingly about her loss in her new book I Wish I Knew, covering all aspects of her life and motherhood.”
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She says it has taken a while for her to recover mentally and physically. “After the operation, it really affected my periods. I didn’t get one for two and a half months – it goes to show how your body takes time. It’s like it didn’t really reset, didn’t keep up.
“It’s a confusion because you are pregnant and then you are not. Mentally it’s been hard because there are triggers constantly, especially in my age group. Everyone’s having babies and that’s lovely. It’s trying to navigate grieving. Being happy for other people but then being sad yourself at the same time.
“Writing it in the book and doing the audio, I have had to relive it. But although it puts you through hard and awkward conversations and feelings, it has helped me.” She also wants to help others and is supporting the baby loss charity Tommy’s with its Mother’s Day We See A Mum Campaign.
Georgia quickly discovered she was pregnant again (https://www.instagram.com/georgiakousoulou/?hl=en)Its aim is to recognise and celebrate all mums, wherever they are on their pregnancy journey or have lost a baby and to encourage people to talk more openly. “I’m working with Tommy’s because unfortunately there are a lot of women who experience baby loss,” says Georgia. “Every story is different, everyone has different experiences. But people don’t like talking about it.
“I really want to be the voice for a lot of people who are scared to talk or don’t know how to say it. It might help them. I know I felt alone.” After the loss, she took time off from work. “I gained a lot of weight. I did that to cope. I ate comfort food to be comforted. I either go two ways.
“I either get obsessed with the gym or eat. I ate this time. I’ve just gone back to the gym.” And what about her husband Tommy, a luxury footwear entrepreneur? How did he cope?
“You are not on the same page at first, you definitely grieve differently. He is so busy, his way of grieving is to get on with life. My way is I took time out. We were on different pages but now we are definitely on the same page. It just takes time.”
Georgia, who appeared on hit ITV show The Only Way Is Essex and has her own reality show Georgia and Tommy: Baby Steps, says that following her loss, a routine scan discovered she had polycystic ovaries. “I was diagnosed six weeks afterwards in a check up. I’d never known I had it. I always had heavy periods, used to get really bad cramps and went on the pill quite young.
“Polycystic ovary syndrome is different where you can have no periods and can be hairy. In my case it’s the heavy periods, my cycle is slightly longer and I actually produce more eggs than the average woman.
Georgia with the cast of Towie (ITV / Lime Pictures)“It could be a positive, that you have more eggs. So I’m taking it as a positive because it hasn’t affected my fertility. I got pregnant with Brody the first time after coming off the pill and I also got pregnant with the second baby very quickly.”
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Georgia admits that she felt low after Brody was born in May 2021. “I definitely did have a bit of postnatal depression. I think it stems from having a C-section because my body went into a bit of shock.
“I was in a dark place at one point and I didn’t understand why everyone was happy and I wasn’t. But now I know that it is so normal. This is where the book came from. That’s why it’s called I Wish I Knew. I remember thinking if people were talking about what I was going through, I wouldn’t have felt alone.
“I felt there was something wrong with me because no-one spoke about it. I’ve written it so that people don’t have to feel silly for asking questions.” She and Tommy, who married in December, want to try for another baby but Georgia is not putting pressure on herself.
“I’ve got a therapist now and she said I’m in trauma still. You can’t try for another baby if you are still grieving. It’s not going to work. So the plan now is just to not do anything - to work on healing and being happy and healthy.”
I Wish I Knew: Lessons on love, life and family as you grow by Georgia Kousoulou is out on February 29 (£18.99, Seven Dials)
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