Restaurant servers offer insight to what they notice when you're out eating
According to hospitality veterans, these are the little tells that will send signals to your server, helping them determine what kind of customer you are, from your very first interaction.
Serving customers across the US for many years, some waiters and waitresses have dished the dirt on some signs they have come to learn they will be dealing with difficult customers.
The way you introduce yourself will often set the tone for the rest of your meal, according to Chuck Anderson, who was a waiter for around 20 years. Chuck said that calling a server by their name and saying your pleases and thank yous always went a long way.
He added: “There were folks [who] would come in … and barely acknowledge you and couldn’t remember what you look like.”
For Darron Cardosa, an ex-waiter who worked in hospitality for around 25 years, looking someone in the eyes was a dead give away for their character. Darron told HuffPost: “To me, the biggest indicator that someone was going to be friendly, or at least nice, is eye contact.”
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Servers will often be able to tell of your friends, foes or lovers (Getty Images)You should also know that your server will gauge the vibe of your table from the start, and nothing goes over their heads. Simon K, a waiter with 6 years experience told Huffington Post that he always knows what the occasion is from a brief exchange with the customers.
He said: “Is it two friends? Is it a date? … You fish those things out just by talking to the guests and find out why they’re there. If someone is dismissive of their spouse, their date or their kids, then you don’t have much hope that they’re going to treat you better.”
Your arrogance may come across in how you order your food and how much you expect a business to bend over backwards for you.
Darron explained he is often taken back by how people expect to swap around ingredients and not pay more. He said: “You can’t just say, ‘I don’t want tomatoes, but can I get shrimp instead.' It’s definitely an upcharge.”
Simon explained that leaving the complicated maths of your various entrees and desserts to a waiter to work out is also not appreciated. He said: “If someone wants … to split the bottle of wine three ways and … the appetizer two ways and then the entrees four ways, that’s going to be really confusing.”
Your tardiness is not your waiter's problem according to Darren. Punters will often come in late and expect servers to mop up their slack time management but Darren’s saying is: “Your lack of time management is not my problem.”
He added: “That is how I feel about people who are in a rush. You knew the show was at 8 o’clock. It’s not my responsibility to make your food take precedence over other people because now it’s 7:15 and you’re just getting here.”
For Simon this also extends to people who outstay their welcome. He said: “The last thing you want … is to have this [last-minute table] that orders three things and then lingers for two hours. Working at a restaurant is literally the most tiring job … people want to go home.”
The most important thing servers pay attention to is the respect you give them. Kelly Ennis, who waited tables for around 15 years said: “We always had this … ‘I’m a server, not your servant’ mindset. I think [customers] need to remember that this is a lot of people’s livelihoods … And being aware of who’s [serving] you and extending a little bit of grace will allow you as the patron to have a better dining experience.”
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Lastly, and maybe unexpectedly, there is no telling how a customer will treat a waiter or waitress by their appearance, it’s more about their energy. Kelly said: “[Being a server] teaches you how to read people’s behaviors on a dime. You can tell when you walk up to a table if they’re in a bad mood, if they’re in a rush … It’s [all about] understanding body language and developing a rapport quickly.”
Kelly added one of her best tippers did not look the stereotypical tipper, saying, “never judge a book by its cover, it could be the best book that you’ve read.”
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