Woman's 'petty revenge' on husband who bought her 'selfish' Christmas present

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She shared her revenge plan on social media (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
She shared her revenge plan on social media (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Some people are better gift-givers than others. And it’s no surprise that it’s usually women who hold the reputation of being more thoughtful than men in that department. When one man thought it was a good idea to get his wife a selfish gift he wanted for himself - she waited a whole year to make him regret it.

She explained how she got her revenge on her husband on Reddit. She wrote: “This was about 23 years ago. My husband was lousy at giving gifts. He would get what he wanted for himself. That year, I came home to a large box wrapped up, about 10 days before Christmas and he said it was for me. He was so excited.

“Mind you, we have always been pretty broke, so we (or should I say I) always bought for our children and his greedy family (my mother-in-law demands). We always did without, “ she said. “For some reason, I wasn’t that excited about this gift. Intuition.”

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Christmas Eve arrived and the family opened their gifts. She said: “He gets all excited, telling me that I am going to love this present. I open the box, to find a ShopVac. We had hardwood and linoleum so I always swept and mopped and had no need for it. He told me that it is wonderful because it cleans up the garage, his domain. Even picks up water. And he said it worked great because he already tried it before wrapping it up. I was p***ed! He bought it for himself. I would have been happy with a $5 (£4) necklace that turned my neck green.”

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She was so angry with her husband for not only giving her a selfish present but building her hopes up to have them crashing down with disappointment on Christmas. She said: “That night, I wouldn’t even go to bed with him. He came into the living room where I was lying down at and told me to come to bed. I told him I wouldn’t because I couldn’t look at him. He then tells me how I was extremely selfish because gifts were to be what we as a family could use, not what we would want.”

“I laid there all night and plotted my revenge. I had to wait for a year, but like they say, best served cold. I kept quiet and told nobody of my plan for revenge,” she said. “50 weeks later I found it. I wasn’t even looking for it, but it was staring right at me as to say here I am and it is time. It was in a huge box. I quickly purchased the gift, got some wrapping paper for it, and hid it. Didn’t want any sneaky Pete’s,” she said.

On Christmas Eve, a full year after the ShopVac incident filled this woman with rage, she put his present under the tree while he was at work. “Took two rolls of cheap wrapping paper and I put some ribbon and a bow on it. It also had a nice weight for it,” she said.

Later on that evening when the whole family was together - the festivities began and this was the moment the woman was waiting for - time to get the sweet revenge she’d waited a whole year for. She said: “We start opening gifts, and I wait a bit. Finally, his eyes light up seeing this big box and finding out it was his. He was so excited, and I told him that this was specially bought for him.

“He opens the box, to find a case of toilet paper. I then quoted him. Christmas was not for what we wanted but what we as a family needed or could use. We all wipe. He was furious. He complained to his brothers and everyone. My family and his brothers told him that he deserved the toilet paper. To this day, no husband will ever buy a vacuum cleaner for their wives as gifts,” she said.

People on the Reddit comments were quick to revel in this woman's revenge. One wrote: “That's hilarious. It would have been funny to hoard the ShopVac to yourself as well and not let him use it for the garage. "It was your gift to ME!" and use it for infuriating stuff like sucking up spilled sticky drinks or milk. Use it as a blower instead of a vacuum. As a doorjam. Taking it apart and using the bottom as a planter. Toilet paper makes a lot of sense though, because his excuses are sh**ty.

One person gave some good advice to sidestep awkward gift-giving, they said: “My dad wasn't a talking man. But he did give me the one best piece of advice I've ever received - "Never buy a woman anything with a cord." Others divulged their own awful present-receiving experiences. A person wrote: “Ceiling fan for my birthday (and Mother’s Day because they’re often the same day). Thirty years later our kids still bring it up.”

Another said: “My dad bought my mom a lawn mower for her birthday. When he got a girlfriend and moved out to his own apartment, he tried to take it, but my mum said that was my birthday present. So twice a week my dad would come to our house, mow the lawn, then load up the lawn mower and drive to his girlfriend’s house and mow her lawn. Then he’d clean the lawn mower and bring it back to my mum’s.”

And one ended with a nice surprise: “My late father-in-law gift-wrapped an obvious mop for my mother-in-law. She was p***ed until she opened it and discovered, yes, it was a mop, but it had an expensive necklace wound around the handle. My father-in-law had a sense of humor and wasn’t a jerk.”

Valerie Browne

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