'I uninvited my daughter from Christmas party - her double life disgusts me'
Christmas is a busy time of year for many with family events, Christmas itself, as well as festive parties. With that in mind, one organised parent decided to host a Christmas gathering with her family earlier in the month to spend quality time together and make up for spending December 25 apart.
However, all did not go to plan as the Christmas event uncovered a family feud between the host’s daughters. Sharing on Reddit’s Am I The A**hole thread, which has since been shared once again on the Best of Redditor Updates chain, Redditor u/electronic_gas_5769 wrote: “Am I the a**hole for uninviting my daughter to our Christmas gathering?
“I am a mother of four children. Two older sons and two younger daughters. All of them are adults and have moved out a long time ago. I have always been close with my daughter Sally, while Penny has always liked to have her own space. Which I don't mind, they’re both beautiful talented young women that I thought I couldn't be more proud of.
“We're having early Christmas this year. First week of December I was inviting everyone around for Christmas Dinner, gift giving and the lot. When I phoned Penny yesterday to clarify a few things she mentioned that she and her husband would not be coming. When I asked she said that they had separated for now as he had cheated. I said that it was surely better to spend time with family if this was the case and maybe she should come home for some time.
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"She is unmedicated and ADHD but then eventually she told me he had an affair with Sally and they had been seeing each other for the past two years. I felt sick. For the past six months in our talks, Sally has alluded that she had been seeing someone and was typically girl-in-love.”
After finding out about her daughter’s infidelity the mother-of-four took back her invite, although this sparked further upset from Sally. She continued: “I uninvited Sally to the Christmas gathering and blocked her. I don't know if I'm able to deal with her before Christmas but this is family time and family can't hurt each other like that. I'm at a loss in all honesty. Penny is now coming which is good because at this time she needs stability of people who love her.
“The problem is that Sally naturally thinks I'm in the wrong. It's none of my business and as her mother I can't block her and remove her from the family. My sister thinks I shouldn't get involved in their personal lives which I think is bull****. My daughter needs us right now. But then she tells me ‘I have two daughters to think about.' Which I think isn't true. Sally has forfeited that right atm. Thankfully my husband is liaising with Sally but he is also in solidarity with me.
“So are we in the wrong for uninviting a daughter for Christmas?” The parent has since updated the thread, and shared: “A small update: Penny's mother-in-law found out. While me and her have only spoken a few times, she did dote on Penny and I know Penny got along well with her. I haven't spoken to her personally, but I know she phoned my daughter and was really supportive and crying.
My sister said that if Sally isn't invited then she isn't going either. Which is fine by me - she wasn't invited in the first place due to the pandemic. Otherwise I've been working and doing some crochet so it's been quiet.” The writer shared an additional post updating readers on her family, including the loss of her husband since the ordeal following a fatal fall.
She penned: “First of all, Penny is doing well! She met someone new about a year ago; they're incredibly supportive and sweet, and they made such an effort in getting to know me and my husband. Penny was still living with me when she started seeing them, so I got to watch their relationship develop - and although Penny is a grown woman I couldn't help but be reminded of when she was a child and having crushes. It was very endearing and I'm glad I got to witness first hand the smile her new partner gives her. Penny also got a new job and has moved to Ireland with her partner.
“Sally and Michael have continued their relationship. I don't have a lot of love to give Michael. I am civil enough but frankly, it is difficult for me to become invested in their relationship at all. Michael recently asked my permission to marry Sally, which was disrespectful, to say the least. Penny still lived with me last Christmas, so again they were not invited. I am not hosting this Christmas and am instead going to go visit my eldest son, he and his wife had a little boy at the beginning of this year. They've asked me to stay with them for a little while so I can help with the cooking and cleaning, as they have been struggling a little bit.”
However, the woman has been flooded for support for her actions. One commented: “After spending too long in JustNoMIL subs it's nice to see such a supportive mother and mother-in-law but very sad to hear about her husband. Wishing them and Penny all the best. I hope sally and that poor excuse of a man get the Karma that's coming to them.”
Another shared: “Goddamn, that poor woman, that poor family.” A separate Redditor weighed in: “I just don't understand siblings like this. I wouldn't ever think of doing something like this to my sister. You have to be really selfish and entitled to think in any way that this is appropriate or a good idea and then to expect to just keep on within the family.”
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