Mayor's son speaks out after father's suicide following outing as cross-dresser

14 November 2023 , 06:59

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Fred 'Bubba' Copeland's son Carter spoke about the type of person he was before he died and said his father was 'bigger than life'

A mayor's son has spoken out after his father's suicide following his outing as cross-dresser.

Fred "Bubba" Copeland just wanted to make others happy, his son Carter said through tears at his funeral on Thursday — mere days after Bubba took his own life after being outed in a heinous act of hate by a local conservative news organisation that published pictures of him dressing as a woman.

"He told me that this was his way of ‘making happy’ was by uplifting as many people as possible during his day," Carter said before recounting a story of when he and his father went to a local McDonald's and encountered an angry worker. Instead of berating her, Bubba simply complimented her hair, which put an ear-to-ear grin on her face.

"While that may not have been true, that was my father's way of at least touching one person throughout his day," he added, according to AL.com. "When you are faced with obstacles or just downright awful, awful people, just be reliant on the Lord and fight with kindness and a pure heart. This is the greatest lesson my father has ever taught me."

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Bubba shot and killed himself on November 3, just days after a hateful series of articles was published about him on a conservative news site (Facebook)

The lead pastor at the First Baptist Church in Phenix City, Alabama, a small city on the Georgia border about 80 miles (129km) east of Montgomery, Bubba shot himself in the head as police approached him for a wellness check on November 3. The 49-year-old died on the spot.

Just a few days earlier, 1819 News published pictures of him dressed in makeup, wigs and women's clothing, then also claimed that he had posted "explicit trans porn" and integrated local women's identities — including their real names and even one minor — without their permission into the erotic fiction he wrote. They described him as a "transgender curvy girl," then sent the photos to the Baptist organisation of which Bubba was a part.

That organisation stated later that it was aware of allegations of "unbiblical behaviour" that involved the pastor, just as a nationally syndicated radio show called Bubba out and said he should be ashamed of himself for the "abomination" he was, saying that the Bible says it's abominable to dress in women's clothing as a man.

Bubba later came out and said he was not trans but that he enjoyed dressing in women's clothing as a way to relieve stress. That same day, he stood in front of his congregation and apologised, stating that the photos, which were taken in the privacy of his own home, were simply his attempt at humour. He emphasised that he was still dedicated to his family, city and church.

In addition to his pastoral duties, Bubba owned a grocery store and was also the mayor of a neighbouring town, Smiths Station. He became well-known in 2019 for his coordinated efforts to help his community and surrounding ones after strings of tornadoes wreaked havoc on the area. That same year, he led a community effort in suicide prevention, posting signs around town saying: "You are worthy of love." "Don't give up." "You matter."

Bubba had reportedly been struggling in the days leading up to his death, telling friends, including Larry DiChiara, the former superintendent of a local school district where Bubba had served as a school board member for many years, that he was going through "some very dark days." Jay Jones, the Lee County Sheriff, said his deputies had been concerned that Bubba might try to harm himself when they went to check on him. That's when he killed himself in front of them.

Bubba became well-known for his response to the tornadoes that swept through his area of Alabama in 2019 and for other efforts he made to help the community (AP)

Referencing the hateful piece put out by 1819 News, DiChiara said: “When this story came out, it was already painful and hurtful just to see it and know that, that this is going to cause a lot of grief for Bubba and his family. But as I read what was out there, it just was getting progressively worse, and I just saw some real ugliness in people and their comments."

In a fiery Facebook post, he wrote: "I just want to ask you people who thought it humorous to publicly ridicule him. Are you happy now? What crime did he commit?”

Jack Drescher, a clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University, said outing like that which happened to Bubba is often an act of violence and that it "precipitated a violent response" in this case. "It was probably a great source of shame and embarrassment to be outed like that," he said.

Bubba said he was not trans, simply that he enjoyed dressing up as a woman — something the Baptist organisation said was an 'abomination' in the Bible (Fred “Bubba” Copeland)

It likely occurred because of the unaccepting nature of Alabama and many other areas of the country, he and former Auburn resident Chad Peacock said. Peacock noted that Bubba was among very few elected officials in the surrounding areas who showed support for local Pride celebrations, adding that he believes the dangerous climate, one filled with vitriol and hate against LGBTQ people, likely led to Bubba's death.

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"You have to fit the box," he said. "You can be who you are, but you should be ashamed of who you are if you're different," he said of the atmosphere in Alabama and across the country.

Alabama has imposed bans on trans women playing sports on female teams, both in schools and in colleges, and it also approved bans on minors accessing gender-affirming healthcare, such as hormonal treatments and puberty blockers. And the state changed the process for obtaining marriage licenses in 2019 after many judges refused to comply with the Supreme Court's decision to allow same-sex marriages.

Bubba left behind a wife and three children and a whole community that loved him

"The unrelenting anti-LGBTQ+ rhetoric coming from state legislative houses and high-profile politicians has real-life consequences in the form of online and in-person bullying, harassment and violence," Sam Lau said. He is the vice president of communications for The Human Rights Campaign. He added that outing public figures is nothing new in US history and that it "consistently causes harm."

Lau called forced outing "a direct attempt to endanger the person being outed." And that statement rang true earlier this month after Bubba took his own life, leaving behind his wife and three children and an entire community who loved him and now work to honour his legacy.

For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email [email protected], visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.

If in the United States, you can dial the 24/7 National Suicide Prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or go to http://SuicidePreventionLifeline.org

Jeremiah Hassel