TV star left in 'unthinkable position' after cancer diagnosis while pregnant
Despite feeling emotionally and physically drained as she undergoes gruelling treatment for breast cancer, former Real Housewives Of Cheshire star Nermina Pieters-Mekic wants to share her story in the hope it might “save a life”.
The model and equestrian recently announced on her social media that she had been diagnosed with early-stage aggressive breast cancer at aged 33, after finding a lump in her left breast. She now feels comfortable enough to reveal she was the very early stages of pregnancy at the time.
“I was pregnant when I found out I had cancer, it broke my heart we couldn’t keep the baby – nobody should ever find themselves in that unthinkable position,” she says. “One night when I couldn’t sleep I sat in Alaya’s nursery. I looked at her height chart on the wall, and thought, ‘What if I’m not here to witness this in a few years? What if I don’t see her grow up?’ They couldn’t do all the checks [cancer tests] because I was pregnant so I kept thinking, ‘I’ll never forgive myself for not seeing Alaya grow up.’”
Her Instagram post quickly received 14,000 likes and comments wishing her well, and is what prompted today’s photoshoot with her West Bromwich Albion footballer husband Erik, 35, two-year-old Alaya, and dog Blue.
Nermina was diagnosed with cancer while pregnant with her second child (Nermina Pieters-Mekic)
Nermina's husband has supported her (Nermina Pieters-Mekic Instagram)Nermina, who joined the Cheshire reality show in 2017, is grateful for the chance to get her message heard – and she needs people to listen.
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“I was diagnosed with this 10 days after my 33rd birthday,” she says. “So yes, it’s lovely having a little glam day but I really want to open people’s eyes, and maybe sharing our experience could eventually save a life.
“I never in my wildest dreams thought this would happen to me. I never get ill, I eat a good diet, I exercise with my horses, I barely drink, I’m very healthy. But cancer doesn’t discriminate. One in seven women will get breast cancer in their lifetime, and a lot of those will be young women.
“It’s easy to think ‘it won’t happen to me’, but it can happen to anyone – I’m proof. I need women to check themselves, and be checked.”
Nermina, who is now make-up free and in a black baseball cap and comfy black tracksuit, is joined for our chat in their stylish Wilmslow home by Erik, whom she married in 2016. It’s clear that the past few months have taken a toll, but their ability to recount sometimes harrowing details of their experience with poise and self-control is admirable.
No topic is off the table and Nermina, who gets incredibly emotional at times, is honest about her feelings and experiences because she wants other women to “know they’re not alone”.
As well as showing us her chemotherapy port fitted under the skin on her chest and removing her cap to reveal her thinning hair, she opens up about the most difficult part of her whole experience – the pregnancy.
The couple had been trying to conceive a second child since Alaya’s birth and took a test just a few days before Nermina went to hospital to get her biopsy results.
“Normally I don’t get upset, I’m a very calm and positive person, but when someone tells you have breast cancer, it’s like an out-of-body experience,” she says.
“I was looking around, and the doctor was saying all these things to me, and I have no clue what he said. When he stopped, I said, ‘I’m pregnant’, and he told me, ‘That changes everything.’”
Following more tests, Nermina and Erik were told if they continued with the pregnancy, it would have an impact on her treatment.
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She would have to undergo an immediate full mastectomy – which is still a possibility – and chemotherapy up until 30 weeks of pregnancy, and straight after the birth. It would also delay and rule out other elements of treatments.
As the lumps in her left breast were growing fast, the couple sought various second opinions from other doctors.
Real Housewives of Cheshire star Nermina Pieters-Mekic had to terminate her pregnancy after being diagnosed with cancer (Nermina Pieters-Mekic Instagram)
She opens up about her experience (Instagram)“We visited a clinic to see what our options were with the pregnancy. Could the embryo be frozen as it was still so early? Could I freeze my eggs too? But when we returned to my doctor for a follow-up appointment, he confirmed that in one week, the lump had grown and that delaying the treatment would not be good.”
Nermina, who has had four of her six planned rounds of chemotherapy, still finds it difficult to discuss their decision not to continue with the pregnancy, but wants to share the realities of cancer.
“I have to do everything and anything I possibly can to give myself the best chance to beat this because I have a little girl here and she needs me,” she says.
And Erik fully supported her. “As a partner, you have to educate yourself and don’t leave it to your partner to have to explain everything to you. I told Nermina from the start I would always be open and honest, and ask questions.
“No one expects this to happen, but when it does you can’t change it, you have to face it. And there’s no better way to face it than together.”
Nermina’s doctors took action to try to protect her reproductive organs from the chemo, but they won’t know how it has affected her fertility until her treatment is finished. It wasn’t possible to freeze her eggs, which is another topic she wants to raise.
“If I didn’t have a daughter already, my heart would break into a million pieces if we couldn’t have children. So I really want to tell women, if they want children and are in a position to freeze their eggs, then go for it.”
It’s now three months since her diagnosis and Nermina has two more rounds of chemo, which is administered through her port. After that she’ll need radiotherapy and regular screening.
“An operation is something we’ll talk about in December, once the chemo is done,” she explains. “I’m going to do whatever the doctors recommend, even if that’s a full mastectomy. I’ll just do it and have a reconstruction, I’m not afraid of that.
“It’s going to be a long journey and I have to remind myself how lucky I am that I found it early and that I’ve got my family around me. It’s a challenge, but I can do it.”
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