'Fiancé wants to delay kids so he can align paternity leave with hunting season'

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She's been left feeling sad and confused (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images)

A woman has been left outraged after her fiancé revealed how he wants to delay trying for a baby so he can coincide his paternity leave with hunting season. She explained how her husband approached her to ask to postpone the next chapter in their lives for six months - because he wants to use his 'free time' once their child is born in the woods.

Taking to Reddit, the 33-year-old woman said: "I need some outside perspective because I’m feeling extremely hurt and confused by what my fiancé has said. Both of us want a family very badly, and have discussed this from day one. He especially has been adamant about finally having children and settling down, now that he’s 'finally found a good woman he loves'. She explained he is 43, ten years older than her, and describes their relationship as, “healthy, happy and drama free”.

She added: "I can count two fights in three years, we’re very good at communicating our feelings overall. We got engaged a year ago, getting married very soon - nothing big at all, both happy just eloping honestly. Our entire relationship though, he’s wanted to get me pregnant because he doesn’t want to wait any longer since he knows I’m ‘the one’.” She naturally wanted to wait until she was truly ready to start a family and described herself as having traditional ideals.

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After three years together, one of which was spent engaged, she finally felt the relationship was at a ‘good point’ to start trying to conceive. “So exciting and surreal," she said: “I found an OBGYN, downloaded an ovulation tracking app, and stopped taking all my meds - some of which I really depend on - all to prepare for this super exciting and long-awaited time.”

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She broke the happy news to her fiancé, who flatly responded with, “We should wait until March to start trying, so that way I can be on paternity leave during hunting season”. The gobsmacked woman said she thought he was joking at first, so she asked if he was. He was deadpan, and replied: “Not joking at all, and repeated himself.“ He then kissed her goodnight and left her in shock as he went off to bed.

“As soon as he left, I couldn’t hold back my tears,” she said. “I’ve been so upset and unsettled since, and a thousand terrible thoughts are racing through my mind. For three years, he’s been so excited and verbal about how eager he was to knock me up. He really struggled with waiting until I was ready. But now that I am finally ready, suddenly his excitement has dissipated?”

Confused, she asked Reddit: “I can’t help but think there’s another reason why he said that. Or are men really that simplistic, that he cares more about hunting than starting our family right now? I’m feeling so crushed. I was so happy to finally give him what he wants, what we both want - and was so happy to make him happy - but now I feel so rejected and hurt and confused, and like his priorities are skewed.”

She hoped getting some outside perspective would help gauge whether she was ‘overreacting or not’. One commenter wrote: “Okay. Deep breath. He’s an idiot. I get that hunting season is a big deal. But the idea that he wants to align paternity leave with hunting season is so a******. The point of paternity leave is to be home with your wife.”

Another added: “Does he have any intention of being an involved parent? Because he seems more like a guy who expects you to do all the kid stuff while he does whatever he wants.” One more person wrote: “I agree. He is seeing parental leave as a type of vacation. It is not. It is hard work. If anything he should want to give birth months before hunting season to be able to be home to help you.” Another advised: “Go back on your medication and birth control until it's settled. No question.”

Valerie Browne

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