'Love Island's lessons in respect - basically misogyny for beginners'

30 May 2023 , 17:02
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At least there is now hope for schoolkids – as long as when they grow up, they apply for Love Island (Image: ITV)
At least there is now hope for schoolkids – as long as when they grow up, they apply for Love Island (Image: ITV)

They’ve believed people in Holland speak Hollandaise and that Brexit meant there would no longer be any trees in the UK, so it’s not surprising Love Island contestants are to be given training before the new series kicks off.

What they’ll be taught is even more basic than the concept of the Dutch language existing though – how to treat each other decently.

Ahead of the tenth season, starting next week, participants will be schooled on mutually respectful relationships, and controlling and coercive behaviour. So, basically, Misogyny For Beginners.

Then the boys will know not to do it, and the girls not to accept it – both of which have happened so regularly in the past that the show has become increasingly unwatchable.

Clearly it’s great this training is happening, while also an incredibly depressing sign of the times that it’s needed.

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And the awful truth is it needs to be rolled out far beyond reality- show wannabes and across the board, to everyone. This whole country needs to become Love Island.

Because if men in a villa full of cameras, aware their every move is being watched, dissected and criticised are acting this way, how are men out in the world, whose every moves aren’t being watched, dissected and criticised, acting?

That’s a rhetorical question, obviously. Like all women, I know the answer, unfortunately. This education needs to happen urgently, especially in light of recent news that the Government is implementing a head in the sand, la-la-la-it’s-not-happening approach to one of the main culprits encouraging this culture.

It’s claimed teachers have been advised not to discuss self-appointed “king of toxic masculinity” Andrew Tate with pupils, despite schools reporting more and more incidents of contempt, prejudice and harassment against women from boys as young as nine influenced by him. Nine .

As the mum of an eight-year-old son, this is as staggering and unthinkable as it is terrifying. Of course there are men out there who wouldn’t dream of acting like this, and women who wouldn’t accept such behaviour for a second, but the horrifying worry is that it feels like they’re fast becoming the minority.

Sara Cunningham from charity Diversify, which runs school workshops, gets around 25 calls every week seeking help dealing with “shocking, misogynistic incidents”. A small church primary school contacted her after four nine-year-old boys locked a girl in a cupboard, made extraordinarily graphic, sexually violent threats, and forced her to watch porn.

One teacher heard a male pupil who frequently mentioned Tate talking about girls and announcing “you shouldn’t take no for an answer as that shows weakness”. The teacher said, “I was shocked by the number of young, seemingly lovely boys, showing the same point of view.”

Cunningham claims officials at the Department for Education have been advising teachers not to encourage discussion of Tate’s views, and are refusing to offer any training or resources.

It’s hardly surprising that the Tory party – which includes an MP who watched porn in the House of Commons, and others who accused Labour’s Angela Rayner of trying to distract Boris Johnson by uncrossing her legs Basic Instinct-style during debates – aren’t tackling this properly.

Although, of course, they talk the talk, with the official DfE line, “We will be providing guidance on how schools can create a culture of respectful relationships, and teach -effectively about sexual harassment, sexual violence and stamping out violence against women and girls”.

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Don’t know about you, but I won’t hold my breath. Still, at least there is now hope for schoolkids – as long as when they grow up, they apply for Love Island.

Polly Hudson

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