Parent sparks debate over giving more inheritance to child who has kids than not

03 March 2024 , 19:01

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A parent has sparked debate about whether or not she should give her child with children themselves more inheritance money (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

A parent has sparked a debate after asking others whether she should give her child who gave her grandchildren more inheritance than the one who didn't.

Taking the controversial question to an online forum, the anonymous person wrote: "If one of your adult children has kids, and the other is childfree, would that affect how you complete your will/inheritance?" So far, dozens of people have replied to the question with their own take on it.

Some have called for each child to be given the same amount, while others think the one with kids may need more financial help when their parents pass. One person commented: "Give each child the same amount. It's okay to give a set amount to grandchildren though. Money given to grandchildren doesn't mean that one kid is getting more."

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Many believed a fair inheritance was the right thing to do, but some disagreed (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Another added: "I am a firm believer in giving two each child evenly, including the amount given to grandchildren. One option is to divide it into two trusts. Your children should each be the beneficiary-trustee of their own trust. The remaindermen should be the grandchildren. If one child has not had kids, that child should have the option to leave the remainder to any of your grandkids or to charity.

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"Or, give half to the child with no kids. Give the other half to the family of the child with kids: give seventy percent to the child and divide the other thirty percent among that child's kids. But don't do it so that one kid's side of the family collectively gets more just because they had grandkids. For one, what if the childless kid has kids down the road, winds up with stepkids etc? but even if that doesn't happen, it just isn't fair to give more to the sibling with kids."

However, this didn't sit well with one commenter on dcurbanmom.com who admitted they wouldn't be pleased if that was the case. The anonymous person wrote: "I would be upset if I got 70% of what my sibling got and my kids got my share instead. Grandchildren should be provided for separately. I want my sibling and I to have equal amounts."

A third person suggested an alternative option, adding: "Also, is there any chance either child would have more children? Look at setting things up such that there is a set dollar amount that will be divided equally among any living grandchildren, and the. 50-50 of the remainder to your two children. That way you aren’t updating your will if you have another grandchild or you forget to do so and inadvertently cut one out."

One person said they would be "completely fine with my parents adjusting for the more kids" (Getty Images)

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Another debater, who has been in a similar scenario said: "Wow, I guess I’m the outlier but my sibling and I both have kids, but one has more. I would be completely fine with my parents adjusting for the more kids or for our relative personal financial position generally.

I mean I think they already do because of annual gifts to each kid? The important context here I guess is that we all have enough money and the grandparents are very generous and always have been.

But also it almost makes more sense to me to split by grandchild because by the time there’s an actual inheritance caused by death, the children will be pretty old anyway? I would also be fine with/expect a bit adjustment if anyone needs a special needs trust."

Sean McPolin