'My mum-in-law gifted me a house but now she wants a say in everything'
She shared her struggle with her mother-in-law's entitled interference with the parenting of her children.
You can't have your cake and eat it - and that's exactly what the internet told the woman as she knew when she married into a rich family. But as her mother-in-law has gifted her and her husband everything from a house, to his card and his children's clothes she's starting to struggle with her persistent mother-in-law
Claiming that her mother-in-law "constantly makes comments" about any decisions made by her and her partner, the apparent reasoning behind it is because they make "stupid decisions" because they are "young, inexperienced and probably not as smart as her."
She stated how her her husband is the youngest of the family and is close to his mum, unlike his older brother who keeps his distance. In a post shared to Mumsnet, the woman in her 20s shared an example of her mother-in-law's criticism after a family day trip to the Young V&A. She said: "We went to Young V&A with our daughters and when mother-in-law called early afternoon as we were on our way back in the car, we told her what we had been up to.
"My mother-in-law's response was 'you kept them indoors for half the day?!' My husband responded that the girls loved it, it was super interactive, and we'll send some pics when we get home. She goes 'Right, um, are you at least planning to take them to the park later today? They need fresh air! How sad for them to be in a stuffy museum'."
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Frustrated at her mother-in-law's interference, she admitted that the financial help from her allows her to be a stay-at-home mum. She added: "She does financially help in the sense that she gifted my husband a house in which we currently live and often gives nice gifts like a car, baby equipment, nice baby clothes etc and invites us on luxurious holidays."
However she admitted how she "hates" the luxurious holidays because her mother-in-law will make comments on every decision and how it's "wrong," but said: "The financial support allows me not to work and be a stay-at-home mum which I'm of course grateful for and perhaps should keep my mouth shut?"
However, the commentators on Mumsnet were not on the mum's side. One person commented: "If someone gifted us a house - trust me, I put up with a lot, lot and lot more than that."
While another said: "You can't have your cake and eat it. As long as you allow her to pay for a house, a car, baby stuff, holidays - and financially allow you to be a SAHM then you've trapped yourself into the role of 'dependent and not grown up enough to support themselves'."
They added: "Make your choice. Either carry on like proper grown-ups and pay your way without support from mummy, in which case I'd feel free to say, 'Yeah - mind your own business, Janet. We're raising children our way'. Or keep putting your hand out for support, in which case expect to suck it up as a poor relationship and tolerate her bossy comments."
The mum also says there is a very significant prenup that has been signed and many of the commenters concerned by this encouraged the stay-at-home mum to get back to working. One person said: "So if he divorces you, you're homeless and he has a better chance of getting the children? Get a job."
A fourth commenter said: "This is the price you pay for being bought, even if it's your husband who took the money."
A fifth person quite tidily summarised what many had commented and said: "In essence, unless you become financially independent this will be your life."
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