Robin Windsor suffered 'too much pain, disappointment and neglect' before death

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Robin Windsor bravely spoke about his mental and physical battles (Image: PA)
Robin Windsor bravely spoke about his mental and physical battles (Image: PA)

Robin Windsor took a downward spiral after experiencing 'too much' physical and emotional pain, a close friend has said.

The former Strictly Come Dancing professional, who sadly died at the age of 44, suffered 'excruciating back pain' that forced him to stop dancing and struggled with depression from a young age, his co-star Kristina Rihanoff has said. The dance instructor, 46, is one of many Strictly stars to pay tribute to the beloved performer online.

In her social media post, where she opened up about Robin's health struggles, Kristina described the 'pain and devastation' of hearing about his tragic death and detailed how his life took a downward spiral after he was axed from the BBC competition in 2014 after he underwent a back operation. Kristina said he experienced "too much pain, too much disappointment, too much neglect".

Robin Windsor suffered 'too much pain, disappointment and neglect' before death qhiddtidtridquinvCo-star Kristina has said it is 'deeply sad' that Robin felt he was better in 'another place'
Robin Windsor suffered 'too much pain, disappointment and neglect' before deathRobin struggled with his mental health and it was devastating for loved ones to witness (INSTAGRAM)

Kristina's lengthy and heartfelt post began: "There is no words to express the pain and devastation. Robin wasn't just my dance partner, he was a friend and together we shared endless experiences from our career highlights to hitting rock bottom of rejection. When I got partnered with him on Strictly I was blown away by his kindness, lighthearted personality and amazing loyalty."

She continued: "He had stood by me through many rough times during Strictly for which I am deeply grateful for as there [was] no one else to lean on. He always found [a] way to bring my spirit up. However his own spirit was absolutely destroyed when he was dropped from Strictly and that's where I started to see changes in his personality, depression and broken self-worth."

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Kristina said he struggled more as time went on with "instability of work and excruciating back pain". She said the "ugly truth" of being a dancer is that there is always another person to take your place. "Many of you, who went to see his farewell tour, know perfectly well that he spoke very openly about his mental health struggles and thoughts of suicide," Kristina said.

"I'm sure it was devastating for anyone who loved Robin to hear something like that, but those thoughts were in his head for quite many years and it's so deeply sad that he felt that he [was] better [in] another place rather than stay here." Robin bravely spoke about his experiences with anxiety and depression in the public eye to encourage others to open up too.

In 2020, he spoke on Dr Max's Mind Clinic podcast about being hit with four setbacks in a short space of time, and how the trauma left a lasting impact on his life. "I had a financial situation and got a bill for £110,000. It took everything I ever had. Then my engagement ended. I started having trouble with my back and I lost my job on Strictly," he said.

Robin Windsor suffered 'too much pain, disappointment and neglect' before deathRobin was heartbroken when his Strictly dreams were shattered by an injured back in 2014 (Getty Images)
Robin Windsor suffered 'too much pain, disappointment and neglect' before deathHe was beloved by millions of fans, former dance partners and Strictly pros (BBC/Guy Levy)

"All of those caused me to go from the highest point in my life to the lowest quite quickly." The late star was left with no choice but to leave the show after suffering a slipped disc in his back. Couple with the end of his engagement to Davide Cini, and having to use his life savings to pay off a hefty bill to HMRC, Robin said his mental health spiralled.

It became so bad that he couldn't get out of bed and his "bad days turned to dark days". He told the podcast: "I always had a smile on my face so people wouldn't know... I didn't tell people things were going wrong." Robin spoke about the moment he "didn't know how to cope anymore" and how it spurred him on to "seek some help".

The dancer leaned on supportive friends; started therapy and bought a book, The Velvet Rage, about 'overcoming the pain of growing up gay in a straight man's world', which resonated with him. He credited his love of dancing with keeping him 'sane' during his darkest times and said he could forget everything that was going on in his personal life when the curtains opened on the dance floor.

Robin also turned to mental health charity Sane for support. He was back on the road by 2015, in a touring theatre production and later launched his own motivational speaking firm. After the news of his death was announced, his friend and currently Strictly choreographer Patrick Helm touched on Robin's self-esteem and declared: "You were loved by so many... but couldn't see it."

The dancer's death was announced by Burn The Floor on Facebook in the early hours of Tuesday, with the dance company telling fans: "The Burn the Floor family has lost one of its founding members, Robin 'Bobby' Windsor - who has tragically passed away. A BTF journeyman he danced with us for twenty years - including Broadway, The West End and all our crazy adventures around the world.

"His stunning image attached with Jessica Raffa defined our company, colourful, extreme and sensual. His talent, attitude, energy and personality helped create the Burn the Floor stage reputation. He leaves a void in our hearts that will never be filled, yet our wonderful memories will stay forever."

*If you're struggling and need to talk, the Samaritans operate a free helpline open 24/7 on 116 123. Alternatively, you can email [email protected] or visit their site to find your local branch

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