Bride refuses to invite dad to wedding after he married mistress behind her back

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She refuses to invite her dad to her wedding (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
She refuses to invite her dad to her wedding (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

A wedding day is meant to be the highlight of someone's relationship, and one of their favourite memories to last a lifetime. But for one bride, the day, and the lead-up, was tainted. A bride-to-be refused to invite her father after he cheated on his ex-wife twice, and secretly married his mistress - a small detail he kept from his daughter for many years.

Taking to Reddit to share the details, the daughter said: "I and my dad have a somewhat awkward relationship, he tries to get along with me but I can't trust him 100 per cent because he was unfaithful to my mum twice. The first time was when I was 3 years old and from that infidelity my stepsister was born; the second time was when my mum was pregnant with my little brother when I was 11-years-old."

After finding out about the numerous infidelities the bride's mother divorced him, and eventually the father and daughter bond started to wane. She continued: "When I was little, my dad was what could be considered the best dad in the world since he visited me every day even though we didn't live together and he was always looking out for me but after my mum got pregnant, his attitude changed and he started to put us on the back burner.

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"When my dad left home, he would come to visit me and my little brother two or three times a month. If we were lucky, he would take us out to eat and take us back to our house." The dad moved on with his mistress, and though he had not explicitly told his children about the milestone, the bride-to-be knew. But time went on, the wedding passed, and he still did not tell his daughter. It wasn't until the bride-to-be was celebrating her 18th birthday the dad invited his mistress, but again, without pre-warning her.

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She added: "Everything remained the same until two years later, when my mum told me that he was going to marry his mistress. I am not temperamental and I prefer to talk about things so I decided to wait quietly for him to call me to talk and give me an invitation but that never happened. Being close to the date of his wedding, I asked him if we could go to the theater that day and he just told me that he could not because he was going to be busy.

"I understood that he had no intention of telling me soon; it was about six months after his wedding and I decided to ask him directly why he did not tell me that he got married. He nervously told me that he did not know how I would react but that he could introduce us to his wife. I told him that I did want to meet her. I thought he was going to tell me a date and that we were going to be able to talk clearly about it with his wife but I was wrong.

"My dad decided to introduce her to me on my 18th birthday as a surprise. I was very uncomfortable and so was my brother but none of them said anything. I just knew that was the last straw and I decided that I was not going to invite him to my wedding either." Despite her mother advising her not to hold a "grudge", the daughter is "keeping [her] word" and has not invited her father to her own wedding.

The post concluded: "I am now about four months away from my wedding to a wonderful man and I am still keeping my word. My mum asked me if my dad was going to walk me down the aisle but I told her that he was not invited. She got angry and said that I could not exclude my dad from such an important event in my life and that I should let that grudge go. She also said that I am not a child anymore. She looked upset so I started to consider whether to tell my dad, but he would still only attend as a guest. My fiancé also thinks I am overreacting (he thought that my dad had just abandoned me). So am I wrong for not wanting to invite my dad to my wedding?"

Reddit users were quick to jump to the bride-to-be's defense, as one commented: "He wasn't a child either when he decided not to invite you to his wedding, so I don't see why your mum's argument is 'you're not a child anymore.'" Another suggested: "He didn't want you at his wedding, why should you invite him to yours? Also it sounds like he abandoned you. If you don't want to invite him, don't do it. It is your wedding and your decision. Also you don't need him to make this day awkward or to drop any other 'great surprise.'" A separate Redditer shared: "I didn't see where he invited you to his wedding, so why invite him to yours. If he's not wanted don't invite him."

Maisie Bovingdon

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