'My ex's new partner stole his sperm - now he wants our kids to meet the baby'

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The mum is agonising over the situation (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
The mum is agonising over the situation (stock photo) (Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

A worried mum has revealed her ex husband wants their kids to meet his new baby - from an ex partner who she says "stole his sperm".

Mum-of-two Sarah is "concerned" about her children's wellbeing after their father "rushed" them into meeting his new partner, before she fell pregnant. She claims his girlfriend 'trapped' him into having a baby, insisting she's seen suspicious messages to prove it.

The dad-of-three, who split from Sarah in 2020, broke up with his new girlfriend and claimed he wanted "nothing to do with her or the baby", Sarah said.

But now, he hopes his children can bond with their new baby brother and the mum. Taking to Netmums to ask for advice, Sarah confessed: "I don't agree with this at all. I think he's deluded he's saying he just wants to show them the baby and say it's their brother and the kids will be fine."

Sarah pointed out that her children, age five and six, "don't have the best relationship" with their dad. She added that they "don't like going" to his house. The bothered mum commented: "I always feel rushed and bullied by him like making the kids meet her and now the baby I feel like he isn't thinking of them at all it's all to make her happy.

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Her former husband met a new woman after their marriage fell apart and they moved in together a few months later. Sarah asked if one Friday night - when the kids see their dad - if she could "make herself scarce". But her ex husband insisted that their children meet her.

Sarah, who is also in a new relationship, explained: "He doesn't have the best relationship with the kids and contact isn't that much. He kept on and on about it saying she didn't want to keep leaving the house every Friday, for reference they’ve never met another partner so it was a big deal. They met her once and then he decided to break up with her.

"On Mother's Day he decided to tell me she's pregnant with his baby. She trapped him in to it - I saw messages of her saying things like 'I just need his sperm' and lying about contraception - it unravelled that she had done this to several other men also."

Sarah added: "From March until September the children's dad proclaimed he would have nothing to do with the baby or the mum. The new baby was born in September of this year and Sarah claims her children's dad says they 'have to' meet the baby and he is now back with the new born's mum. I worry he hasn't prepared them for this. They [the five-year-old and six-year-old] are so close that they're best friends and I think springing a brother on them will be confusing."

A number of fellow mums and dads rushed to share their divided opinions on the awkward parenting scenario. One commented: "I think you are still hurting and are too involved in their relationship re the comments she trapped him etc. Understandable you are hurting but the ins and out of his relationship are not your problem. He wants them to meet a baby sooner rather than later. Children are resilient if they just get sensible information. I would tell them first and give them time for it to sink in. Then ask them if they want to meet their new sibling."

Another said: "You're not being unreasonable at all. Given the situation, it's only right you're looking out for your kids' feelings. Taking things slow and talking it out with the ex might be the best move. Also, trusting your gut is key. Keep doing what's best for your little ones."

Another parent commented: "They should meet their brother. They may grow up to resent not meeting him otherwise and be angry with you. But I agree it needs to de done the right way and sensitively, so it's a great idea to ask the school counsellor to work through this with them. There is no rush. Tell him you're willing for them to meet the baby but for their sake it needs to be done right and carefully."

Meanwhile, one woman said: "As for your children you should sit them down and tell them about their new sibling and let them make that choice on seeing the baby. It's not something you can keep from them, if you do it could potentially bite you in the backside in the future."

Lucy Marshall

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