17 April 2023 , 18:00
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Dame Deborah James' heartbreaking and poignant final letter to her family saw her address her children, telling them to be "brave" and "only marry for love".
The BBC podcaster, who tragically lost her battle with stage 4 terminal bowel cancer in June 2022 aged just 40, penned the book 'How To Live When You Could Be Dead' whilst she was dying.
In it she recorded all the lessons she learned throughout her four year fight with the disease, paying particular attention to staying positive in the face of adversity.
The Dame had some special advice for her children.
The Dame had some important advice for her childrenAfter describing the 'mental snapshots' that never leave you as a parent, she talks about the moment of seeing her now 14-year old son when he was just four days old and cradled against her. She describes that point she said began to 'understand what love was'.
Dame Deborah James's mum shares 'agony' for grandchildren she can't cope with
She added that she wished she could 'protect him in the way' she did when he was so young, but remained confident her children will cope without her.
"I believe in self-fulfilling prophecies, I believe in rebellious hope and I believe my children will be OK when I die," she wrote. "I want them to realise that life does not always go according to plan.
"You can make plans, and you can have goals, but you have to be prepared for the fact that sometimes life is more interesting when you go off-piste — so be brave. Take a chance and back yourself.
Deborah passed away believing her children will cope without herShe continued: "Don’t leave the world and all it has to offer until retirement — experience it now. Learn to balance living in the now and being present in the moment with your plans for the future (although this may be the hardest lesson of all). Marry only for love."
Continuing to discuss making the most of life, she told her kids that we are 'given 86,400 seconds every day' and you only 'understand their value' once they begin to slip away.
Deborah closed by revealing her 'greatest advice' - to 'do whatever you want with those seconds'.
How To Live When You Could Be Dead, by Deborah James (Vermillion, £14.99), is out on August 18, 2022. £3 from each UK sale will be paid to the Bowelbabe Fund for Cancer Research UK. Cancer Research UK is a charity registered in England and Wales (1089464) and Scotland (SC041666).