18 January 2024 , 05:15
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If you’re having problems with drugs and alcohol, it can feel very lonely, but you’re not on your own - and you can start taking positive steps straight away.
Whether you’ve already tried to get help or have had a relapse, support is available and there’s always someone you can talk to.
Worried about a family member or friend's addiction?
Broaching the subject can be tough, but if you think someone close to you has a problem with drink or drugs, you can help to direct them to the right support and let them come to it in their own time.
If your friend or family member is happy for you to do so, you can contact FRANK or its local drug and alcohol service on their behalf. Call the service any time on 0300 123 6600 for confidential advice.
How can I find help if I'm struggling with drugs or alcohol?
You can call FRANK any time on 0300 123 6600 for confidential advice and information, including how to access treatment services and find support near you.
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Go and see your GP, who can discuss your problems and get you into treatment. You may be offered help at the GP practice or be referred to your local drug and alcohol service.
Any health professional, including your GP or practice nurse, can support people who need help to access the free expert services that are near you.
If you’re not comfortable talking to a GP, you can approach your local drug and alcohol treatment service yourself without a referral. Alternatively, a friend or family member can contact them on your behalf.
What can I expect when I get help with addiction?
Most people can get help to stop drinking in the community and if you need medicine you can take it at home or attend your local service daily.
Some people might need a short stay in a medically supported unit where they can get safe treatment for withdrawal symptoms.
Your drug treatment will depend on your circumstances and could include different strategies. You could stay at home to have treatment or could be referred to residential rehab.
Treatments are available on the NHS and will be free.
Phil Hetherington’s life has been transformed since he got support for his alcohol problem – he recently marked 365 days without drinking
(Jo Ritchie)“There is a life without drinking”
As a teenager, the lure of cheap drinks and big nights out consumed Phil Hetherington. He lost his dad when he was 14 and went from job to job to fund his social life.
“I got a taste for alcohol. It took me away from real life and became a coping strategy,” says Phil, now 42.
'So fed up of tiresome pal flirting with my husband and always putting me down'
“From Thursday to Saturday, I went to pubs and clubs in Hartlepool where you could pay £10 and drink as much as you wanted. Then, on Sunday, it was a pound a drink all day.”
Despite being arrested for crashing his car while under the influence of alcohol, Phil, originally from Hartlepool, remained in denial.
“I had to find rock bottom before I could contemplate going into recovery,” says Phil.
“I was just starting to get my life back on track and I’d had my first child when my mum died of cancer, so I went back to my old ways. I had no parents, I was lonely, I drank more and it was a vicious circle.
"That’s when I crashed my car, got arrested and lost my licence. But I still wasn’t ready to stop drinking.”
After relocating to Darlington and meeting his partner, Anne-Marie, Phil received a card for WithYou, a charity with 80 services across England and Scotland.
Following a three-day bender, he decided to reach out to them.
By this point, he was drinking so much that stopping immediately would have threatened his health, so he kept a diary and was given support from the service to cut down.
Additionally, he joined a 12-step programme organised by a local charity in Darlington, finding support from a community of individuals facing similar challenges.
Phil and Anne-Marie’s lives have been transformed by his decision to seek help (Jo Ritchie)“When you’re in that dark place, you believe you’re the only person in that situation,” he says. “But you go to your first group, realise you’re not alone and you can chat it out.
“Places like this are absolutely critical. They’re often led by people who’ve been there themselves, so give it a go and start engaging because there is hope for you.
“Addiction is like a full-time job – you’re not only thinking about drinking, you’re also covering your tracks.”
Having surpassed 365 days without consuming alcohol, Phil now leads his own support group. It provides activities like pool, dodgeball, and football to promote the mental health of others in recovery.
He has also transitioned to a new career. “I was in paid work, but my heart wasn’t in that job,” he says.
“My heart was to help people in recovery, so I became a peer support worker.”
Anne-Marie and Phil are still together today and their lives have been transformed by his decision to seek help.
“There are so many benefits of tackling your drink or drug problem. Not only are you going to feel healthy, you’re also going to get all the amazing friendship and love you’ve been seeking this whole time,” he says.
“There have been so many times I’ve sat there opening can after can, thinking, ‘I want to stop, but I can’t. My partner’s going to be angry with me, but I’ll deal with that’.
“It’s an awful circle. It doesn’t matter how much you drink, the problem is still going to be there in the morning and it only gets worse over time.
“And trust me, there is a life without drinking.”
Drugs nearly ruined Connie Wilton’s chance of being a mum, but now she’s clean after getting the help she needed
Connie Wilton embraced the assistance provided (Luis Alvarez)“I finally thought enough is enough”
Connie Wilton was just 11 when her dad was killed in a road accident.
She went into a spiral of substance abuse, smoking cannabis and moving on to class A drugs and found herself in abusive relationships.
By the time she became pregnant in 2020, she was desperate to get help.
That’s when she found Phoenix Futures in Sheffield which employs a whole-family approach, providing support for both parents and their children.
“My issue was drugs. I was all messed up. It was being around the wrong people and going down the wrong path,” says Connie, now 37, from Greater Manchester.
“When I fell pregnant, I thought enough is enough, and became determined to change my ways and surroundings.”
Going into treatment changed her life.
“I was a mess when I walked in and now I’m more confident and have my self-esteem back,” says Connie.
“I don’t have cravings and I’ve got the willpower to carry on.”
Three days after enrolling with the local service, Connie gave birth and embraced the assistance provided.
Despite facing tragic events, such as the passing of both her mother and brother while she was in placement with the service, she exhibited remarkable resilience and continued her recovery journey.
"I’m more confident and I have my self-esteem back"
She left in May 2022 and, rather than spend Christmas alone, returned to the service for the festive season.
Embarking on a fresh start in Accrington, Lancashire, Connie is now raising her two-year-old daughter, Ruby, caring for her dog Roxy, and working with horses, as part of her ongoing efforts to rebuild her life.
And she has this advice for anyone thinking about getting help.
“You’ve got to do it for yourself or nothing is going to change. Grab it with both hands and give it a go.
“You’ll feel 100 per cent out of your comfort zone but have faith. All you can do is give it your best.”