12 July 2023 , 12:20
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Nickelodeon child star Jennette McCurdy has said she felt "uncomfortable" and "violated" after her mother insisted on showering her until she was 18.
Now 31, Jennette has opened up about her complicated relationship with her late mother Debra McCurdy and revealed how it affected her growing up.
Speaking on the Louis Theroux Podcast, she claimed her mother would shower with her until she was 17 or 18, while "shampooing and conditioning my hair, washing my body."
The actress, who is best known for her role as Sam Puckett in iCarly, recalled how Debra would be fully clothed while she washed her daughter.
"She would give me breast and vaginal exams in the shower and said that she was checking for lumps, she was just checking for cancer," Jennette claimed.
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Debra McCurdy and Jennette McCurdy had a complicated relationship (Patrick McMullan via Getty Images)
She said she couldn't shower alone until she was 18 (WireImage)The star admitted she felt "uncomfortable" during the showers.
"I knew it felt violating for me. And I knew I didn't want it, but the one time I had attempted to even say, 'Hey, do you think I could shower myself?' she flew into hysterics," she said.
Jennette explained how it "became clear" that she would be unable to try and shower herself again.
She claimed she did not shower alone until her mother started treatment for cancer. Debra died from the disease in 2013 at the age of 56.
Speculating about why her mother was unwilling to let her shower alone, Jennette suggested: "I think it's the fear of me growing up. It's body monitoring."
Jennette is well-known for her role in iCarly (FilmMagic)
She said her mother didn't want her to grow up (Getty Images)She added: "It had always been really clear to me that my mom did not want me to grow up, not just for acting, but it also felt like her worth was tied up in me being young.
"With me being young, she had something to do. She felt good. Me growing up kind of felt like her loss of purpose."
Speaking to host Louis Theroux, she said she had asked her mum if she could stop her physical development at the age of 11. Jennette alleged that was when her mum introduced her to calorie restriction.
"She weighed me daily, and she measured my thighs with a measuring tape. She taught me what diuretics were, and we would read calorie books together and constantly were just in this, kind of as partners in crime, and it felt amazing," she said.
However, she admitted she is now aware of how "warped" the situation was.
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Jennette suffered from anorexia and bulimia while growing up, but said she now considers herself "fully recovered".
If you are in the UK and you're experiencing a mental health problem, you can call SANEline on 0300 304 7000 (4.30pm–10.30pm every day). If you or someone you know is struggling or in the US, call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org. You can also reach Crisis Text Line by texting MHA to 741741.