12 January 2024 , 18:54
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Sue Perkins and Anna Richardson candidly confessed that they didn't speak to each other for a long time following their acrimonious split back in 2020.
Appearing on Anna's podcast, It Can't Just Be Me, the comedian and TV presenter, 54, opened up on her break-up with Anna three years ago, after an eight year relationship. Speaking for the first time, the pair shared with fans how they managed to transition from a relationship to a friendship.
The pair decided to not speak to each other at first, in a bid to heal after they went their separate ways. But they then worked together and dealt with the painful issues in their relationship, before they could consider a friendship.
Anna said: "We didn't speak," as Sue responded, "Yeah, for a long time." Sue went on to say: "You have to sort of detonate parts of the familiar in order to grow new things, different ways of being, which are born out of friendship.
Sue Perkins and Anna Richardson open up about their painful split in 2020"And also, you have to forgive what's been, don't do history lessons. Once you get that space, the history lessons stop. What I mean by history lessons is in a row you go from talking about the thing that's upsetting you in the moment to then tracking back through all the other things in your past, that has been points of inflammation."
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The former Great British Bake Off host continued: "Our break and split and time apart and everything has meant that we no longer do history lessons. We can forgive and just go, it's all OK." But the journey to friendship was not an easy one. She added: "I think a period of having no contact was good, and then slowly, voicing the things that had been excruciatingly painful and realising that they were never going to be solved, so let them go. If you hold on to those things that made you sad, made you angry, all we're going to do is replicate that, but in a non-sexual context. So both of us in our own way let stuff go, it helped of course that other things come in, other distractions."
And it was at this point Anna said:"That's certainly what I missed - the love but also the fun. When you've got that with somebody, when you go "do you know f**k it, let's let go of all that s**t", ultimately our very core is love. We understand each other." "All that love can be repurposed into a friendship, I really believe that," Sue added.
After their split in Christmas 2020, news emerged the following year in June 2021. At the time, the Mailonline revealed that nobody else was involved. A source told the publication: "The split is as amicable as these things can ever be. After so long together it wasn't an easy decision to make and they both did so with heavy hearts. But Sue and Anna are determined to remain friends and keep in touch. Nobody else is involved and now the pair are throwing themselves into work."
The former couple reportedly decided to part ways after Sue allegedly didn't want to start a family. Anna had previously said that she had thought about adoption as she felt that "time is running out." A friend said at the time: "It's really sad they've split, but it's been on the cards for a while. We know Anna was really keen to be a mother, but Sue just didn't feel it was the right time for her. She loves travelling and working on various projects and she appreciates that lifestyle and the responsibility of being a parent doesn't marry well."
In May 2022, Anna told OK! Magazine: "I suppose I don't know whether you become more resilient as you get older, but heartbreak is still that mystery that needs to be solved, and how you get over it and become stronger." The pair first began dating in 2013 after meeting at a Halloween party following Anna's split from her partner of 18 years Charles Martin. Speaking to The Telegraph in 2015, Anna said she had known Sue for years but she soon realised, following her split from Charles, that there was something more than just friendship between the two.
She explained: "When I was invited to the party, I was told Sue would be going and I felt, what, a frisson? A spark of interest? And I thought: "Hmm, that's interesting". There was something in the air. It was an extraordinary night. I was dancing on the table. It felt like a defining moment in my life."