23 December 2023 , 14:57
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Kelsey Parker has offered advice to those who are facing their first Christmas following the death of a loved one.
The 33-year-old mum-of-two was left widowed in 2022 when her husband, The Wanted singer Tom Parker, tragically lost his life following a brave 14-month cancer battle at the age of 33. He left behind Kelsey and their two children; Aurelia, four, and Bodhi, two. Kelsey has confessed that Christmas last year was a struggle as Tom had passed away nine months earlier.
Having been widowed as a young mum, Kelsey appreciates that there could be others facing a difficult festive season following the loss of a loved one. She has shared her experience and insight and the advice she would give to others going through tough time.
Speaking to the Evening Standard, Kelsey said: "I really struggled with Christmas last year because Tom used to spend a lot of Christmases with my family, [so] we tried to mix it up and do something different.
Tom Parker's widow Kelsey has shared advice on coping with grief at Christmas (being_kelsey/Instagram)
Tom left behind his wife and two children when he died last year (being_kelsey/Instagram)"I think if this is your first [Christmas] of losing someone, try and do something a little bit different. Also, remember that person, but don’t be so hard on yourself, like, if you’re having a bad moment then have that moment and embrace it, then try and get on with the rest of your day."
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She also explained that writing a book about grief had also helped her cope with her emotions and thoughts. She said: “I think for me writing the book has had that realisation that this is my life, this is what I’ve lived through and it shows how strong and positive you can be when life throws cards at you that are really, really c**p.”
Last Christmas, Kelsey shared a throwback photo of her family from the year prior - showing Tom surrounded by his wife and children. Sharing the image via Instagram, she wrote: "The littlest things that I didn’t really think of before now feel so huge.Going food shopping - no need to buy your Christmas favourites this year. Setting places at the table. Writing gift tags just from mummy.
"I’ve been putting Christmas off because honestly I’ve been dreading it. But it’s for the kids, they’ve always been my reason to get up each day and find the positives, and never has that been more true than this week. There’ll be empty chairs tomorrow and tears, but there’ll also be smiles, laughter and dancing - just as you would’ve had it."
After her book, titled With And Without You, was published in September, she shared her joy at being able to help others through her words. Highlighting her book, which she described as a ‘pinch me moment’ when she saw it was published, she wrote online: “You’ve all been so important to me over the past couple of years and I wouldn’t be getting these opportunities without your support so having the chance to meet you in person for a chat is so exciting!”