02 December 2023 , 20:38
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The widow of PC Andrew Harper has found love again four years after her husband’s horrific death.
Lissie, 32, is in a new relationship with an emergency services worker. PC Harper, 28, was killed trying to stop quad bike thieves while on duty in 2019 when he was dragged behind a car at 60mph for more than a mile down country roads in Berkshire.
His clothes and body armour were ripped away and he suffered “absolutely catastrophic, unsurvivable injuries”. A gang of three thieves were sentenced for his manslaughter in 2020.
Lissie and Andrew had married only four weeks before, after meeting when they were both 16. Speaking about her new love for the first time on podcast The Stigma of Grief, Lissie admitted she felt pressure to be seen as grieving, but feels it’s important to live again.
Andrew and Lissie (PA)
Lissie during the Harper's Law campaign (PA)She said: “There’s this expectation to be this figure, the grieving widow... like we’re expected to wear black for the rest of our lives and sit and mourn. It’s not sustainable... and it’s not fair. And although some people resign themselves to being alone for ever, that’s not the case for me.”
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Lissie, who has not revealed her partner’s name, said: “It’s normal to feel scared and wonder if you’re doing the right thing. It’s a common feeling of do I deserve to feel happy again? Am I betraying the person I love who isn’t here?” The business owner said: “I think probably most of the people who sadly aren’t with us would want their loved ones to find happiness again.
“It’s not going to be the same, it’s not going to be better or worse, it’s just going to be different and that’s been really important for me to find that again. There’s no right or wrong time, no matter what anyone else says.”
Speaking about her and her new partner’s first date, Lissie admitted it felt “strange” after being with her late husband for so long, adding: “You become a different person when you go through something like this. You kind of grow out of the person you were before because you have no choice.”
And Lissie, from Oxford, – who successfully campaigned for Harper’s Law to ensure a minimum life sentence for anyone who kills a 999 worker – said she was partly drawn to her new man due to his role.
She said: “People who are in that type of job are compassionate and thoughtful and caring. I can understand why people would think, ‘Why would you put yourself in that situation again?’ You can’t think like that because then you’re in fear of living and that’s not right.”
Gang ringleader Henry Long, 19, got 16 years after admitting PC Harper’s manslaughter, while Albert Bowers, 18, and Jessie Cole, 18, were sentenced to 13 years after being convicted of manslaughter but acquitted of murder.