Entirely in line with the Bazball manual, England batted like a team with a train to catch – and urgency was their undoing.
Not for the first time in a memorable series, too many of the top seven acted in haste and repented at leisure.
Amid the flashing blades, chop-ons, strangles down the leg side and heaves at perfectly straight deliveries, only Ben Stokes – castled by a rasping outswinger – was largely blameless.
Make no mistake: Australia are on top at The Oval, and under-fire captain Pat Cummins was their talisman on a rollicking opening day. When the Aussies were reprieved by Manchester's most consistent currency – rain – last weekend, Cummins cut an embarrassed figure as the old enemy retained the Ashes on the back of an apologetic draw.
He bowled like a drain at Old Trafford, his rotation of bowlers was a tumble-dryer of chaos and his captaincy appeared to be on a short lease. But it's amazing what the spin of a coin can do for your reputation.
Jake Paul calls on John Fury to make retirement bet for fight with son TommyAt the fifth time of asking in this series, Cummins finally won the toss – and his bowlers made full use of a greentop, not least the skipper himself.
Figures of 1-66 off 13 overs may not look too flash at face value, but Cummins was terrific.
He hit the pitch like a blacksmith knocking a horseshoe into shape on his anvil, troubled every batsman with his pace and generous carry through to the keeper and he was the epitome of leading from the front.
When the Aussies abscond with the urn through Customs at Heathrow, Cummins will be the major reason why they clung on to it in the face of a Bazball whirlwind.
It was his unbeaten 44 at Edgbaston, a mixture of cussed resistance and sensible aggression, which settled the first Test in a 'nipper.'
It was his refusal to reprieve Jonny Bairstow at Lord's – correct fidelity to the laws of cricket but a missed opportunity for sportsmanship – which turned the 2023 Ashes from renewed sporting rivalry into a tinderbox on the brink of a diplomatic incident.
And it was Cummins who came rampaging in from the pavilion end here, even if he only had Steve Smith's sharp catch to dismiss Zak Crawley as tangible reward. Australia are the Test world champions for a reason.
As a captain, Pat Cummins is in the take-it-or-leave-it class. But he's still ranked the No.3 bowler in the world Test rankings, and he has the respect of every England batter.