'I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time'

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The woman wanted the kids to have a bed time - but her husband told her to
The woman wanted the kids to have a bed time - but her husband told her to 'lighten up' (Stock Image) (Image: Getty Images)

Sometimes, when you're taking care of kids, all you want to do is have a relaxing moment to yourself - it can be really hard work. Especially if the little ones in question are 'very draining', leaving few moments for 'some adult time'.

That's what one woman complained about when she took to Mumsnet to vent that when she and her husband look after her husband's children from a previous relationship, she feels 'drained' after the weekend. She said she wanted the kids to have a proper bedtime, but her husband told her to 'lighten up' because the sleepovers only happen once a fortnight - but she was fed up.

'I don't want children staying up late at weekends - I really need adult time' qhiukiqrihkinvThe woman said the children were staying up later than her and her husband - and she wasn't happy (Stock Image) (Getty Images)

She wrote: "My husband's children come over every weekend one Sunday all day or Saturday from 4pm until Sunday 7pm. These weekends are turnabout. They are 10 and 7. We also have them during the week two nights but not overnight.

"I find the full weekends very draining as we don't get a minute the whole weekend for some adult time. My step-children are only here one night a fortnight but I would like them to have a bedtime at 9pm at the latest.

"It's 7.30pm at their mum's. My husband says that it's just one night in a fortnight and I should lighten up, I do understand his thinking but sometimes they go to bed after us, 11pm and that means the TV is monopolised by children's films.

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"Am I being unreasonable with this suggestion of a bedtime? I won't enforce it, of course, it's not up to me but he seems to think I'm being ridiculous."

In the comments, many people said that they agreed with the husband in the situation, saying that it doesn't happen often enough to worry about.

One wrote: "I'm with your husband on this. It's one night in 14, you get to watch what you want on tv the other 13 nights. If it all gets too much why not make plans to meet your friends some nights they are there?"

Someone else said: "I think it's fine for them to stay up late with their dad. Not okay for him to insist you stay if you don't want to. Contact time is for the kids and him."

Another parent guilt-tripped the woman, writing: "I understand its hard, they aren't small for long and just want love and acceptance, they didn't ask for any of this."

A Mumsnetter did agree with the step-mum, however, writing: "10 year old and 7 year old staying up til 11pm and going to bed after the adults? And parents think this is ok? My kids would have been ruined the next day with that lack of routine.

"Original poster, obviously others disagree but I'm with you. Though my reasons are for the children's sake, whereas yours are for you. But still, no way would I be ok with that."

"Late is ok, but later than the adults is not", someone agreed.

What do you think? Let us know in the comments.

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Danielle Kate Wroe

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