07 March 2024 , 12:04
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There's one specific indicator that any relationship is doomed, according to a top relationship expert.
It's no secret sometimes our other half can get on our nerves - but at the end of the day it's usually nothing too serious and we still love them. But Australian relationship expert and dating coach Debbie Rivers has revealed there's one huge indicator your relationship is "doomed" and can be the "leading predictor of divorce".
The relationship killer, according to the pro is "contempt". The official defitiniton of contempt is 'The feeling that a person or a thing is worthless or beneath consideration' and Debbie warned if couples start to show this, it's the start of the end.
The notion of contempt towards someone is feeling that they are "inferior" and is what Debbie thinks will end any relationship. She claimed it also includes the feeling of "anger" and "resentment". She told The Mail that some of the common signs of contempt can include things such as giving insults, sarcasm, eye rolling, or mockery.
Debbie further said acting like you're "better than your partner" as well as name calling and hostile humour will also kill any relationship. She explained: "It is feeling like they are beneath you - an air of superiority. It's hard to solve a problem if your partner gets the idea/message that you are disgusted with them."
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This can come from "long-term resentments" as well as couples who could have unresolved issues - which lead to negative thoughts about your partner causing contempt. The relationship expert explained that it's different to criticism also as contempt will make it harder to resolve.
This claimed was backed up by leading Australian relationship expert Dr Lurve, who also said contempt is: "That toxic cocktail of disrespect, condescension, and a general sense of superiority towards a partner." She advised that it's "crucial" for couples to recognise this happening and address it straight away. By doing this, she added: "Open, honest communication and a commitment to mutual respect can serve as powerful antidotes to contempt, fostering healthier and more enduring connections."
She urged people to make a "collective effort" to bring to light and banish any feelings of contempy and instead, replace these feelings with positive values instead. Making your partner feel loved and respected is important and she said this can create a long lasting love.